The Pill or d & c?

vivalaj281

just found out we have to miscarry. In technical terms a miss-miscarry. I am roughly around 7 weeks and not sure if the pill or d & c will be the best choice. Reading reviews it's half and half and I am needing some advice on what I should do? I heard good and bad things on both ends, my husband and I are at a loss. Thank you for your advice and I am sorry for all our losses.

SonyaL9

Hi viva, I'm so sorry for your loss and hope you find some comfort from this group. I'm going through the same thing at the moment and I've found it so supportive.
With regards to your choice, I researched both and opted to go for the pill, I was booked in to take that today. At 6weeks gone my nurse encouraged the tablet over the d & c, she said it was better in the long term recovery wise, however after reading some comments a lot of women recover very quickly both ways. As far as advice on how it went for me I'm pleased to say I never got round to taking it, my body started miscarrying naturally last night so hosp advised to stay put an let body do its thing... I think natural is always best but the waiting time is horrendous when all want is closure! Lots of love to you throughout this horrible time x

vivalaj281

Thank you Sonya for your response. I am so very sorry for your loss too. I read so many things on both d&c and pills. I just want it to be done, I know it sounds crazy but I can't bare to witness it and bring in tissue samples to the doctors office. I'm scared on both ends, I'm afraid of the pain I will go through physically and mentally if taking pills and if I opt for surgery I will be done in 15 minutes and not know anything at all. I already have a tough time getting a cycle I just don't want anything to mess up if doing surgery. I am hoping it will happen naturally but no symptoms yet on my end right now. Thank you for your response.

rachrobertson

I opted for a d&c after I discovered we had a mmc. I couldn't stand the thought of waiting then having to decide what to do with our baby after I passed him/her. I also read where some woman take the pill and don't pass everything on their own and have to have a d&c anyway. You may look into it or ask, but I have read where some woman who did have irregular cycles get them regularly after a d&c. Obviously with the procedure, you run the risk of scar tissue which is scary. I had 2 days before we went back to tell the doctor what we wanted to do, in that time, we researched pros and cons of both and went armed with questions. Our baby was almost 10 weeks when growth stopped and the pill has really only been researched for mc under 7 weeks. So, that may be a better option for you, but for us, there was a greater chance of everything not passing. So sorry for your loss, this is a sucky decision to have to make.

Edaggrr

Very sorry for your loss! My experience is not normal so this will likely not be your experience, but with my first miscarriage I took the pill and it didn't work. I was given a second set of pills and ended up in the ER. I had to have a d&c in the ER and then a second d&c a few months later because they didn't get everything. I don't want to alarm you at all, as this likely won't be your experience, but if I opted for the d&c first I would have had an ob that was really experienced in the procedure instead of an ER doc. I highly recommend a d&c, it is over so quickly and the pain is minimal. My cycle got back to normal within a month. Good luck and take care.

vivalaj281

Thank you ladies both for the feedback and I am very sorry for your losses too. We decided to go for the d&c and I have an appointment set up for Wednesday. I am very nervous but I'm sure that hour will go by quickly since I am going under. I am somewhat relieved we are getting this done immediately. I am sad to know this is all happening right now, but it's time for my husband and I to move forward. But I can't stop crying, but this is definitely something that makes us stronger.

rachrobertson

I didn't feel like I could start to heal emotionally until after the physical part was over. I had almost a week between finding out I was having a mmc and having the d&c and I cried daily that week. I took a week off after the d&c and by the time I went back to work, I was to the point I only had a breakdown a few times a week with triggers. Take time for yourself and don't be afraid to be needy for a bit. Oh, and have a heat pad ready for after the procedure. Cramps weren't horrible, but stronger than menstrual cramps for me. It was nice to have around the first few days.

MWoodside

With my first loss I opted for a d&c. It was smooth, easy and then it was over. I have zero regret.

In fact, I've decided for my current loss I will be opting for a d&c again. I just need this done and over.

For reasons I can't totally articulate, the pill freaks me out. Maybe bc starting m/c isn't the intended use? I've also heard anumber of people tell me it is super intense and painful if it works for you. Like I was advised to have someone here to care for my children if I took the pill. Also, I know several people who ended up needing a d&c after taking the pill anyway.

I hope your d&c goes smoothly and you recover easily from a physical standpoint. I'm sorry for your loss.

cassie71270

I've done both. D&c after a 10wk loss and started hemorrhaging. Then recently in April a failed cytotec at9weeks and then d&c. Now I'm 10w4d and baby didn't go past 5w4d and just waiting to miscarry. We did cytotec again but I'm wishing I opted for d&c again bc it is dragging on and I'm not even bleeding, just spotting off and on for 5weeks.

vivalaj281

Thank you ladies for such a great response, I am sorry for your losses too. It's very hard right now, and moving forward seems to be easy to say out loud but I know it's going to be hard to do. I can't help but to break down throughout the day. For once my husband and I were mommy and daddy for the 7 weeks. I know we will be forever since we know our baby is in heaven. One day I know we too shall overcome this, once I get everything done on Wednesday is our next step and just grieving will be my next challenge. I continue to pray, and for everyone going through this or has I pray for you too.

snarky14jd

We were in the same boat.  I am sorry for your loss.

I opted for the D&C to get it over with... I couldn't bear to think about sitting at home and wating for it to happen.  

vivalaj281

I am sorry for your loss too, I am not nervous for tomorrow I am just sad that this is coming so soon and it's reality. It's hard, I don't know it's just too soon and unfortunate.

snarky14jd

vivalaj281 said:

I am sorry for your loss too, I am not nervous for tomorrow I am just sad that this is coming so soon and it's reality. It's hard, I don't know it's just too soon and unfortunate.

Good luck and prayers!

vivalaj281

Thank you prayers going your way too.

Knottie8531229

I went with the D&C. My dr recommended it as it is less painful (2 minutes of pain vs. possibly 30 or so minutes with the pill) and immediate. She also said some people after pill have to get D&C anyway because they want to make sure everything is cleared out. And the longer it takes, the less likely it will happen for pill so again might have to get D&C anyway. I also agree I did not want to see ANYTHING so her doing it was much easier.

That said, it's a horrible experience knowing what is happening and it is not comfortable (and painful for about 2 minutes). But I decided it was the lesser of 2 evils. 

vivalaj281

Sorry for your loss too. Yes we decided to go with d&c and had this done today. It is still hard to know this just happened. I'm just in utter shock still

MWoodside

My d&c was yesterday, too. The first time I recall the shock. It took a lot of emotional healing. This time it's easier, sadly.

vivalaj281

I'm sorry for you loss too. It's hard to overcome. Even though I had mine done Wednesday its just sinking in slowly that I'm just me and no longer we. We will all get through this soon.