Hi - I think this will be my home for a while.

bananers

We aren't trying yet, but the miscarriage board is so slow and I got such great support from this board after our last loss that I thought I'd jump in here again if you'll have me!

Yesterday at 13 weeks we went in for a checkup and our baby had no heartbeat. The kicker is that the baby was measuring right on track at 13w1d and I had just found the HB via home doppler three days earlier, so it had to have just happened. We are in shock and completely devastated. After going through a loss once before at 8 weeks, we were cautious about pregnancy, but we were finally starting to feelpretty good after reaching the "magical" 12 weeks. We told most of our friends and family last week, so the past couple days have been really draining "untelling" everyone.

I'm not sure when we'll try again. I will have a D&C next week, and then the doctor wants to run some tests before we start trying again to see why this has happened twice now, once in the second tri. But I'd love to get to know you all and am sorry there are so many of us in this awful club.

KIMRED22

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I know the devastation and shock, but to only have heard heart 3 days earlier,is extra devasting.I had a mmc at 12 weeks in march- 1st pregnancy- found out during ultrasound too. I will never forget that day for the rest of my life.

I really wish you a quick physical recovery. Hopefully you get answers from your doctor. MC is so hard and unfair, only time has healed some of my hurt. Take good care of yourself during this difficult time.

MamaBish

Hello!
I am so sorry for your losses. Any loss is heartbreaking and the process of untelling is excruciating.

Best of luck to you!

GhanimaAtreides

OMG @bananers , I haven't been on the January BMB thread since my loss, but you were seriously one of my favorites in the group and I'm devastated you're joining this side. I'm seriously fighting back tears because you shouldn't have to go through all this. It's not fair. Not fair at all. Especially with the untelling. I'm sorry it's been more emotionally draining than churning out the support some claim is a silver lining.

I hope the procedure goes smoothly for you and you'll get all the extra tests and answers a second later loss warrants. You deserve some of the news like "we now know how to totally prevent this next time when you're ready"... or something to that effect.

In the meantime, there's no right or wrong way to process it all or recover. (Unless you look at the disaster I've made on the regular TTC side... apparently everybody disapproves, it's been nasty.) But it looks like you'll fit right in with their definition of normal. You'll just have to pretend you don't know the pariah freak "BSC" that's choosing not to wait to TTC. You'll do so much better than I did. You'll probably get all the support you'll need too.

Gosh lady, it sucks that you're here. Hoping that you have a speedy physical recovery and find your path with the emotional one.

snarky14jd

I am so sorry for your loss. I'm also not Ttc yet but this board has been amazing.

bntfroggie

Hi I just wanted to say sorry for your loss.  It is so hard once you get that boost of confidence of hearing the heartbeat and thinking everything is going to be okay.  I wish you the best of luck when you decide to try again.

myndihallberg

I'm so sorry for your loss.

DH and I had a MMC at 12 weeks exactly in March. Same thing that happened to you, happened to us. Our baby measured right on track. I hope you can find some peace in this terrible situation and if you need anything we are all here for you!