Still no urge for sexual intercourse

sexygaly27

I haven't had intercourse since before I gave birth and my daughter is now two months. My partner is complaining about being sexually frustrated and says if I don't do anything soon he will move out. I just don't have the urge right now I explained to him that I don't feel 100% yet because my body is still not like before I got pregnant. I explained to him that I don't feel attractive anymore and he tells me he doesn't care how I look that I'm still sexy in his eyes and he still desires me. Any suggestions anyone???

slipsintothesea

It's silly for him to threaten to move out.... Are you holding off because you are self conscious? Honestly, I felt a bit self conscious because I'm not back to where I was before pregnancy either. My son is 2 1/2 months. I got the ok after my 6 week appointment and my husband was definitely ready and we had sex a few days later. I felt silly for worrying so much because everything went great. It sounds like your husband still thinks you are sexy (and how could he not you just brought his child into the world). If there isn't a medical reason you are waiting then maybe try kissing and see where that takes you.

alexis95

For some reason I haven't really been feeling up to sex as much as before we had our son (we had sex regularly before and during pregnancy), but I've tried my hardest to not let it get in the way of our romantic relationship. I know my husband has needs and wants sex, so even though I'm rarely up for it I still make it a point to do it because I want him to be happy and not think that I don't love him anymore or don't want to be intimate anymore. Like the pp said maybe just try kissing and seeing where it takes you, you might end up being really happy you did it!

sexygaly27

Thank you ladies I will definitely try the kissing and yes I am a bit self conscious. I want to get back into shape ASAP but I'm not sure if I should try so hard because he wants to have another baby next year :-S

slipsintothesea

Try not to be so hard on yourself.... I know it's easier said than done and I'm definitely way to hard on myself at times. Every time I try to pop in an exercise video while little man is sleeping he wakes up.... Pinterest has some great workouts you can do throughout the day and even using your babe as your weight. I have been using those to tone up as well as walking or swimming at my parents' pool. You will get there just give yourself time.

morninglory530

I have struggled with self-image issues, too, and had the same problem. Baby is almost three months and we just did the deed for the first time...my husband has been incredibly patient, and it's been a gift to me. It's unfortunate your significant other is threatening to move out...but I think you should definitely give it a try and take things slow and be patient with yourself. You're not alone in struggling to reopen that piece of your life.

sexygaly27

Its good to know I am not alone. Thank you

ewilson74

Breastfeeding also affects sex drive, and the low estrogen makes you dry. You will want to take it slow and use lube if breastfeeding. There is a good chance that there may be discomfort, but that will pass.

sexygaly27

Thank you I noticed for my six week checkup with my obgyn that it hurt since its been a while. I thought I was gonna rip open especially since I was cut during labor

mswaltonj

I was really nervous about having sex again we did it 4 weeks after and it was even better that before I was pregnant. I really don't no what I worried about but what helped me was I had a few glasses of wine and just got on with it once the initial shock has gone it's amazing xx don't worry yourself Hun x

sexygaly27

Well it worked thank god lol the urges are coming back now the kissing really helped

Nickioch

I'm worried more about the bigger issue here of him threatening to move out whether or not you were ready to have sex. Body image and dryness etc is all fine and can be dealt with and I get that everyone's urging you to just try, and I don't know you or your significant other, but it's concerning and makes me sad to hear it. I hope you can try to open communication and have him be more understanding and patient, he'll need to be those things through every step of this new life. I truly am not judging or trying to make anyone feel bad, I just hope you're in a safe and loving relationship ❤️❤️

sexygaly27

Nickioch I appreciate the concern, to answer your question I am in a loving and safe relationship the problem is that we have been having issues in that department for a while now even before I got pregnant and of course while I was pregnant and afterwards it got worst. But we are working on it. Things are looking a lot better now. Thank you