Inconclusive results (I'm going CRAZY!!)

jilligan14

Hey ladies,

I seriously feel like I'm going crazy. I was ready to write this cycle off since I had a very clear BFN yesterday at 12dpo and some intense pre-AF cramping. I even had a "I'm never going to get pregnant" emotional meltdown and my best friend brought me some sympathy chocolate. I tested again today (13dpo) since I'm planning on testing/continuing progesterone until 15dpo. I used the cheap Wondfo and swear I saw a "shadow" line so pulled out a CVS test (which is supposed to be similar to a FRER test). I waited the full 2 minutes and when I looked, there was the faintest test line (so very faint) but it was only half the width of the control line. I'm not sure if that counts. I also don't know if my eyes were playing tricks on me since it was so early. I couldn't do another test since I'd tossed out the cup o'pee while the 2nd test was calculating.

I'm getting a lot of symptoms: sore/achy/heavy breasts, dizziness, nausea, cramps, mood swings, etc. but ALL of these could be from the progesterone supplement I'm taking  :-/  My temp also jumped up high today. I'm just so tired of this cycle and for feeling hopeful, then defeated, then hopeful, then depressed, then confused, then frustrated, etc.

I just need to share all of this since I'm literally driving myself crazy...

Tomerine

Oh, @jilligan14 , how I feel your emotional pain. I'm rooting for you though and so hopeful that line gets darker. Would love to have some good pregnancy juju around here! When will you test again? Fingers and toes crossed for you!

suziq1978

I have everything crossed for you!  Let us know when you test again.

Carazona5

Ugh I can feel your frustration!! I would be going crazy too. I'm hoping for good solid lines for you next time you test!!!!

lady+bee

Argh! So frustrating for you!!! Sending you good thoughts, and let us know what happens next!

jilligan14

Thanks everyone! It really helps to share my misery and confusion with others! I'm definitely going to test again tomorrow morning because I'm not a very patient person and I'm too addicted to peeing on sticks to stop myself :-) I'm really hoping it wasn't just a fluke or that my eyes weren't playing tricks on me...

sonpetitlapin

***Lurker***

When I got my BFP that same day it was very very light squinter and over the next few days it darkened up.  (I tried to wait 48 hrs between testing).  FX for you this is it!!!  I am so happy and excited for you.

thistle8677

@jilligan14 a faint line!!! Everything crossed for YOU!!!
My temp is still up and no AF. I'm gonna test later today. Will update.
SO excited for you!

happyktmom

I'm rooting for ya, whatever the answer is!!

What a stressful time! I'm sorry - sending hugs and positive thoughts

jilligan14

sonpetitlapin said:

***Lurker***

When I got my BFP that same day it was very very light squinter and over the next few days it darkened up.  (I tried to wait 48 hrs between testing).  FX for you this is it!!!  I am so happy and excited for you.

Thanks for sharing this! It's reassuring to know that there are squinters even at 13dpo! Although I've now convinced myself that the line was actually an optical illusion and that I'm just delusional...sigh. This whole TTC process really makes me slightly batty @-)

I know I should wait 48 hours but once I start the testing process, I want to test every single day. It's a real problem.

jilligan14

@thistle8677 - I feel like we are on the same rollercoaster! Hope one day, utter defeat the next...Do another test and let us know the results!!!

carrieandr

@jilligan14 and @thistle8677, you guys have me on the edge of my seat. I might pee on my chair just out of excitement.

jilligan14

So I know you're not supposed to look at the test after the allotted time, but I dug it out last night anyway because I just wanted to see how/and if the line changed. But it was exactly the same: very thin, very faint, but still there! I was very surprised that it didn't change. I showed a friend and she saw the line too, even though she had to squint a bit. So at least I know that I didn't imagine it (as I had managed to convince myself throughout the day yesterday).

I took another test this morning (a different brand from yesterday) and it was a bfn. No line at all. So once again I'm stumped :-?

I'll do some more testing tomorrow morning at 15dpo and I guess if everything is negative, I'll assume I'm not pregnant and stop taking the progesterone.

This has definitely been an emotional past few days...

carrieandr

Sorry, @jilligan14. :-<

It's hard riding this roller coaster.

suziq1978

@jilligan14 - I still have everything crossed for you.  Keep your head up.  I'm sorry you're going this right now.

emsmama15

I'm sorry @jilligan14.    I'm still hopeful!  I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

thistle8677

Oh no @jilligan14!!! I am so sorry.
Have you been temping as well? I'm so bummed for you.

Tomerine

I'm sorry @jilligan14. Getting jerked around by pregnancy tests is no fun. Thinking of you.

jilligan14

Thanks all! I'm coming to terms with the fact that this cycle is probably a bust. @thistle8677 I have been temping. There was a big rise yesterday and a drop today, although still above the cover line. But I don't think my temp will drop too low while I'm still taking the progesterone. I guess I'll see what tomorrow brings...

jilligan14

Also, the test with the faint line was a blue dye test. I've been reading that those aren't as accurate. Has anyone heard about that?

Knottie16743552

I've heard terrible nasty things about blue dye tests giving false positives. I'm sorry... Try a pink dye.

thistle8677

@jilligan14 yea, blue dye is evil.
Ironically, I took a FRER test this morning and got a WHITE line. Not pink, not grey...white.
It later turned into a faint shadow.
We are both experiencing some trickster energy in the universe. That's for sure.
Hang in there. Xo

jilligan14

Why do they sell or make the blue dye ones if they are so evil? All the other tests have been pink dye and they were all negative.

@thistle8677 wait, a white line!?! But isn't the background white? How is this possible? It does seem like we are part of some magic spell right now..

thistle8677

@jilligan14 right?!!! The line was solid white...whiter than the background. I'm telling you, this is a cosmic conundrum. #cc
It's official. #cc= cosmic conundrum.
There. Done and done.

emsmama15

@jilligan14 - I'm sorry to say, I've also heard awful things about blue dye tests.  I'm SORRY!  I really thought this was your month...

jilligan14

Ugh. How on earth did I get this far in the TTC process and just now discovered that blue dye tests are corrupted???? I feel so silly now. If only I'd researched this more before, then I could've avoided that fleeting moment of hope...blah.

@thistle8677 - I love the #cc! Are you going to test again tomorrow? Who knows what else the tests will do?

I'm just so ready for this cycle to be over...

thistle8677

@jilligan14 probably won't test tomorrow. I don't know, maybe if I get some dollar store cheapies. This POAS habit is getting expensive. 8-}

jilligan14

@thistle8677 - I know!! I've gone through so many tests in the last few days. I don't think my H knows how much I've spent on tests. Luckily he just doesn't ask!! I really want to learn how to discipline myself to wait until 15dpo next cycle. I wonder what the secret is...

thistle8677

@jilligan14 I literally went through 10 Wondfo's & 4 FRER's. :-\"

thistle8677

#cc

jilligan14

thistle8677 said:

@jilligan14 I literally went through 10 Wondfo's & 4 FRER's. :-\"

Okay, at least it's reassuring to know that I'm not alone!! I went through about 5 Wondfo's, 3 FRER's, that horrible, cursed, deceptive blue-dye test (CVS brand - I've learned my lesson!), and one ClearBlue digital.

Today was my last day of testing since it's 15dpo. It was a very clear and strong BFN - no lines whatsoever. So that's that. I'll stop the progesterone tonight and AF should arrive by Friday.

Thanks for all the support ladies while I rode this crazy, unpredictable, insane roller coaster. Sigh.

Tomerine

I'm sorry @jilligan14 . I hate the roller coaster. [-(

Carazona5

Aww sorry @jilligan14

Knottie16743552

Hugs to @jilligan14 >:D<

emsmama15

Aww, I'm sorry @jilligan14.  That just sucks.  Hugs to you...

lady+bee

Sorry to hear that @jilligan14. I was so hopeful for you. Hugs to you.

jilligan14

UPDATE: AF showed up late last night, two hours after I was supposed to take my progesterone pill. She's in full force today so this cycle is officially over.

Thanks again for all the support. I've really appreciated it!!

Knottie16743552

I know clean slates suck but there's something mildly (very mild) refreshing about them. Looks like you can try for a St Patrick's Day baby with me and @CarrieandRoy !!!

thistle8677

@jilligan14 I'm sorry
I got mine yesterday morning.

jilligan14

@thistle8677 - that means we are *almost* cycle buddies this cycle! Although I bet you'll O before me...I tend to O quite late in my cycle.

@Knottie16743552 - yes, I agree that a clean late can feel somewhat refreshing. Well, I guess i can get on board with the St. Patrick's Day baby movement!