Encouragement for FTM's in the first few days

angiekdz · April 2015

Hey ladies! I am an occasional poster and regular lurker, but I thought I would share some words of encouragement for other FTM's about the first days after delivery. I went to the hospital on Tuesday morning after finding a lot of blood in the toilet when I peed that morning. Contractions started, intensified, and by 2:30pm, Genesis Rue had made her entrance into the world. She was born at 37 weeks, 5 days. I don't have a lot to say about labor and delivery, and I know that everyone's experience will be VERY different in that regard, but I wanted to share a few thoughts because there were some unexpected moments after delivery. First, my blood pressure tanked after delivery. I was feeling really terrible, but I didn't want to say anything because I wanted all of the focus to be on the baby. When my mom said that I didn't "look right", they found that my blood pressure had dropped from 140/90 to 70/30. So, first, if you feel bad, SAY SOMETHING! You won't be a distraction from the care of your child, and it will help them address the problem quickly. Fortunately they were able to take care of it within a few minutes, and I didn't have any further problems afterwards. Second, breastfeeding can be difficult, but it gets better. I felt like a failure the first night as I tried to make her eat every 3 hours. Sometimes it took me an hour to get her to latch, and then I wasn't even sure if she was getting anything. Use the lactation consultants in your hospital if they are there. Try every possible hold/technique because what works for one person might not work for the next. I had to strip her down and do skin to skin every time I wanted her to eat the first night, and I would have never thought of that until someone suggested it (thankfully I don't have to do that for each feeding now). Third, it's not going to be this difficult forever. I was warned by the nurses that the second night was going to be especially challenging because she would wake up every hour or so to "help" my milk come in. While I was very appreciative of LO's efforts, it was exhausting to feel like I just finished feeding her and then have her start smacking her lips. The funny thing is, the night before I would have LOVED for her to smack those lips!! I guess that's just to say that if you are feeling hopeless, don't give up! These little ones will change and learn things really quickly, but it won't all get straightened out in the first 12 hours, so have some patience. Also, a final piece of advice is that when someone offers help, TAKE IT!! My husband has been extremely helpful during this time. It sounds funny, but I feel like the pain that keeps us from doing certain things is actually a blessing in disguise because it forces us to rely on others for help. Friends have stopped by and visited, and if someone says "Can I get you anything?", I am now saying, "Yes...a (fill in the blank) would be nice." That is NOT my nature, but now is not the time to be superwoman. We are now home with our 3 day old little girl, and while I'm no expert on this whole baby thing, I thought it might be helpful to share this while it was still fresh in my mind. If anyone else has words of encouragement, please post below!!