Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Intro (maybe a bit tmi, I don't know)

I am 33 years old and my husband is 38.  We will both turn another year older later this year.   I have PCOS and we have been trying to have a baby since late 2013.  The hardest part about getting pregnant when you have PCOS  is being able to calculate and track your ovulation dates and know when to have sex during the right time.  Additionally, my cycles are not typical.  They vary in how long I go between periods.  So I have had a ton of negative pregnancy tests.   On January 25, 2015 I got my very first positive pregnancy test.  I was so excited that I scared my husband to death because I was screaming.   We were so excited.  We were thinking about the baby and foolishly went out and bought a few things for it.  We are regular shoppers at the Goodwill and found a ton of good toys for it, lots of Leapfrog and Vtech stuff.  Couldn't pass those deals up.   Went in for our first ultrasound on February 9th to get the due date.  Was told I was not as far along as they had thought.  And was told to come back on the 20th and they would be able to date it and give me a more definite due date.    On February 17 I started spotting.  I freaked out and called the on call nurse.  They made me an appointment and I went and had another ultrasound.  The cervix was closed, the baby had a heartbeat of 160.  Everything checked out.  They did discover a SCH of 1cm, but they thought it was on the way out since I was bleeding and it looked like old blood.   On February 20th we went in for the other ultrasound that was originally scheduled.  Again the baby was still fine.  Cervix was closed, heartbeat was stronger than before 162 and we got to hear the heartbeat.  We were so excited. 
My husband went out of town for work on Tuesday the 24th and came back Friday the 27th.  During the time he was gone, I had more of the same bleeding, and lots of headaches and extreme fatigue.  I also had a little bit of cramping, but it never lasted long, so I just thought it was the "normal" kind of cramping that is very common with pregnancy and the uterus expanding etc.  On Friday Feb 27th my hubby came back home from his trip.  I was having some stomach pains, but I had a of gas and I also suffer from IBS and it felt a lot like that.  I was really constipated and I thought it was really just terrible gas pains.  We went out to supper and pains were still there.  We got home, and the pains were still there.  We both just thought it was the combination of gas and IBS.  The pain kept getting worse and worse until I could not take it anymore.  Hubby rushed me to the ER.  We got there about midnight

At the ER the pain was so bad by then I had to be wheeled around in a wheel chair because I was walking doubled over.  They did blood tests, urine tests, an ultrasound, and a pelvic exam.  They gave me morphine and started an IV for low sodium.  After the morphine kicked in and took the pain away, the doctor came in and told us that the baby did not have a heartbeat and based on the measurements that it should be at and the measurements it was out, he estimated that the baby's heart had stopped beating on Feb 21st.  I was diagnosed with an incomplete miscarriage and given a shot in the arm to make my body start to empty the contents of my pregnancy.  I have to call my doctor and go in tomorrow to be checked to see if all the contents came out and if not then I will have to have a D&C. 

I am crushed.  I'm already worried about trying again and wondering how long will it take this time to get pregnant again, and will it stick around.  I'm scared to death.  We do plan on trying again because we want a kid. 

I had imagined the kid (originally due 09/28/2015) being born.  I imagined a lot of things.  I bought toys and onesies, and other stuff.  I knitted baby hats and booties.  I have all this stuff around me that I know we will need for our baby should be be lucky enough to have one.  

I am a mess of emotions.  I go from numbness, to anger, to weeping, to acting normal.  When I do fall asleep, I wake up and have temporarily forgotten about the loss until I go to the bathroom and see the blood.   I am a mess. 


First Pregnancy
  • BFP: 01/25/2015
  • EDD: 09/28/2015
  • Incomplete MC: 02/28/2015

Second Pregnancy

  • BFP: 09/11/2015
  • EDD: 05/25/2016
Baby Born
04/15/2016



PGAL

Re: Intro (maybe a bit tmi, I don't know)

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