Trying to Get Pregnant

Feeling Overwhelmed

edited February 2015 in Trying to Get Pregnant
Hello! New to theBump but I've been reading posts here and there.

So DH and I started TTC in November. The first two months we just gave it the old college try but since I know it's unlikely that my ovaries follow the "typical-ovulate-on-day-fourteen" I conceded and got an OPK. Prior to TTC, my period had been fairly regular (somewhere to 23-25 days) but now that I'm aggressively watching it, my cycles are now closer to 30 days (which, by the way, resulted in a happy-anxious trip to CVS for a HPT on our second try). 

After reading a few posts about longer LH surges (which I saw last month and have seen this month - 4 days so far) and that most of you seem to recommend BBT, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed at how complicated this whole thing is starting to become, as opposed to how I originally viewed it (naive, I know!!) . I joke with DH that it was easier to not get pregnant the last 10 years than it has been to get pregnant the last 4 months. I'm not at the freaking out stage yet, not even close, but I'd rather not waste any more time if I can avoid it (and as a side note, it doesn't help that almost everyone I work with is pregnant or has a billion babies).

I'm due for my annual at my gyno in April so I definitely plan to discuss it in more detail with my doctor at that time, but I guess I'm kind of hoping for some wisdom from current Bumpers (Bumpies? Is that the correct term? If it's not,I sincerely apologize!). What worked for you? Should I be taking a pre-natal already? And I know this was kind of addressed in a previous post, but what might cause a 4-day LH surge (the sticks are not expired)?

Thanks in advance :)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
TTC #1 - Nov '14
BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
DS born 10/18

LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
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Re: Feeling Overwhelmed

  • Just a warning, your OB will probably pooh pooh the whole temping idea. Long LH surges just happen. There's usually no reason for them. Temping is really not hard and takes about a minute a day. Do the tutorials on Fertilityfriend.com and good luck!
    My TTC History:
    2009: missed miscarriage #1 at 9 weeks (trisomy 16)
    2010: Infertility
    2011: Diagnosis and treatment (low sperm count, anastrozole for DH, clomid for me + IUI)
    2012: Baby #1
    2014: Baby #2
    October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
    March 2016 BFP#5, due November 2016.

    My Charts since 2009

  • Yeah, because 29 is totes ancient. 

    And yes, take your prenatal. You should have started months ago. 

    You are having a 4 day surge because you have enough LH in your urine to turn the test positive for 4 days. Temping is only complicated if you like turning little things into the OMG worst thing ever.


    I'm sorry,what's your problem Blahblah? 
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
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  • Yeah, because 29 is totes ancient. 

    And yes, take your prenatal. You should have started months ago. 

    You are having a 4 day surge because you have enough LH in your urine to turn the test positive for 4 days. Temping is only complicated if you like turning little things into the OMG worst thing ever.


    Haha. Omg, I missed the 29 year old comment. How will op take care of her baby in the nursing home!!
    You know, I was actually thinking about the baby. After 30, the chance of Down Syndrome increases.

    But thanks. For everything. So helpful and encouraging. 
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing


  • Yeah, because 29 is totes ancient. 


    And yes, take your prenatal. You should have started months ago. 

    You are having a 4 day surge because you have enough LH in your urine to turn the test positive for 4 days. Temping is only complicated if you like turning little things into the OMG worst thing ever.


    Haha. Omg, I missed the 29 year old comment. How will op take care of her baby in the nursing home!!

    You know, I was actually thinking about the baby. After 30, the chance of Down Syndrome increases.

    But thanks. For everything. So helpful and encouraging. 


    But surely, you understand that your risk at 30 is only the tiniest bit higher than your risk at 29.
    Coffee Bean Born 6/13/15.
    2nd round exp 8/20/18.
    Meow.
  • Yes, I am totally aware. And I also know that sometimes people have to try a really long time to conceive before they actually get pregnant, hence why I said I don't want to waste time.

    I'm sorry I mentioned my age. It wasn't the point of my post, but I know now that shouldn't have brought it up at all.
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
  • Is there a way to delete my post? 

    I'm not sure what I did to piss you off, but I really am sorry. 

    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
  • No one is pissed off. You are flailing your arms over nothing and refusing to even try the ONE thing that could help you


    So whatever. 

    What have I refused to try in the time that I made this post? When did I flail my arms? I made one post - got one semi-nice response and then two responses mocking me. 

    I said I was overwhelmed, not huddled in the corner crying. 
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
  • Temping. You made a comment about how horribly overwhelming the process is. You take your temp, put it on a graph/computer program. It's not complicated. You've barely been trying and haven't been tracking at all and you seem to think you have issues based on nothing. 


    You OP seems like you want everyone to tell you something is totally wrong and your eggs are old and your doctor should do testing right away. 



    Oh, and to answer your question, what worked for us? Thousands of dollars in testing, meds, and IUIs. I'm sure that helps a ton.

    Nope. I never said that. I said I was overwhelmed by ttc. There are many facets I didn't consider about it since the main focus of my reproductive years up until a few months ago was not getting pregnant. And as I said before, that is much easier. 

    I am sorry that I struck a nerve with you and that was not my intention. 
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
  • Um, I was just joking around. Btw, I'm 10 years older than you and somehow had two kids without Down syndrome. You're really creating an issue where there isn't one.
    My TTC History:
    2009: missed miscarriage #1 at 9 weeks (trisomy 16)
    2010: Infertility
    2011: Diagnosis and treatment (low sperm count, anastrozole for DH, clomid for me + IUI)
    2012: Baby #1
    2014: Baby #2
    October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
    March 2016 BFP#5, due November 2016.

    My Charts since 2009

  • As I mentioned before, this was not meant to be the focus of my post :)

    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
  • There is no harm in taking prenatal vitamins at this time. Temping is very easy and is the only way to truly know if you are ovulating. OPKs can tell you if you have an LH surge but can't verify ovulation. A BBT is about $8. MyFertilityFriend.com has a great charting tutorial and a great app that just allows you to plug in your temps, opk results, and symptoms and it does the rest of the work for you.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I'd like to point out that I don't think BBT is easy for me personally because of how insanely tired I generally am when I wake up. No matter my sleep schedule, I'm unconscious until I get into my shower.
    Everyone is different with what comes easy to them. No need to make them feel bad about themselves, especially when they are expressing that they are overwhelmed to start.
    "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." <3
  • BritniB86 said:

    I'd like to point out that I don't think BBT is easy for me personally because of how insanely tired I generally am when I wake up. No matter my sleep schedule, I'm unconscious until I get into my shower.
    Everyone is different with what comes easy to them. No need to make them feel bad about themselves, especially when they are expressing that they are overwhelmed to start.
    "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." <3</p>




    That's ridiculous. Get a BBT that stores the last temp. Stick it in your mouth or vagina when you wake up, listen for the beep and turn it off. Once you're "awake" enough to read it, turn it back on, read the last temp, and put it in fertility friend. Not difficult at all.
  • Temping. You made a comment about how horribly overwhelming the process is. You take your temp, put it on a graph/computer program. It's not complicated. You've barely been trying and haven't been tracking at all and you seem to think you have issues based on nothing. 


    You OP seems like you want everyone to tell you something is totally wrong and your eggs are old and your doctor should do testing right away. 



    Oh, and to answer your question, what worked for us? Thousands of dollars in testing, meds, and IUIs. I'm sure that helps a ton.

    Nope. I never said that. I said I was overwhelmed by ttc. There are many facets I didn't consider about it since the main focus of my reproductive years up until a few months ago was not getting pregnant. And as I said before, that is much easier. 

    I am sorry that I struck a nerve with you and that was not my intention. 
    OMFG. You are overwhelmed because you are turning nothing into something. 

    Stop apologizing. Christ. Get a little self esteem.

    Real mature. 
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    TTC #1 - Nov '14
    BFP 2/3/16  EDD 10/16/16
    DS born 10/18

    LFAF: Frankly Disturbing
  • BritniB86 said:

    I'd like to point out that I don't think BBT is easy for me personally because of how insanely tired I generally am when I wake up. No matter my sleep schedule, I'm unconscious until I get into my shower.
    Everyone is different with what comes easy to them. No need to make them feel bad about themselves, especially when they are expressing that they are overwhelmed to start.
    "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." <3




    That's ridiculous. Get a BBT that stores the last temp. Stick it in your mouth or vagina when you wake up, listen for the beep and turn it off. Once you're "awake" enough to read it, turn it back on, read the last temp, and put it in fertility friend. Not difficult at all.



    Giggity.

    To recap: Take the PNVs. Temp. Chart. It can take a healthy couple a year to conceive. If you're going for your annual in April, that's fine, but otherwise there's no need to see your doc unless you go 60 days without a period or have a BFP. I had my squirt at 31, and his egg was fine.


     

  • BBT might seem a little intimidating at first, but after a while you will barely notice it.  Sorry you were met with such hostility.  I got my BBT thermometer at Target for like 8 bucks - don't bother with the $40 ones on Amazon.  I use Glow and I really love it, but it sounds like Fertilityfriend is also great.  With the combination of BBT and OPK you will hopefully have some luck at understanding your cycle.

    Good luck!
  • I wasn't hostile. I gave a quick summary of what to do and said babies aren't doomed if they are born after age 29.
  • Actually if you want to be honest, the risk of a child with any chromosome abnormalities increases every cycle. However, the significant risk increase is not 30 but 35.
    That is why 35 is called advanced maternal age (ama).
    So even at 29, you are have a higher risk than a 20 year.
    According to March of Dimes, the risk of a Downs syndrome child at 25 is 1 in 1250 and @ 30 is 1 in 1000.
  • This is going to be my last response. If I could delete this thread, I really would. I have learned a great deal from helpful Bumpies regarding charting, BBT, CM/CF, and OPKs. It was also nice to know that there are other women out there that are newly TTC and feeling overwhelmed as well. 


    In a previous post, which was flagged by a troll (and therefore removed), I stated that I realized I was over-reacting/worrying over something very insubstantial early on in the life of this post. I have tried several times to turn the conversation back to the best way to approach TTC (like BBT, charting, OPKs, etc), but was met with some hostility, though that person appears to have been removed from the community (in other words, I am not referring to anyone currently posting here on this thread). 

    I do sincerely apologize for poor wording and any hurtful blanket statements that I have made. 

    Also, I would like to reiterate that the health of future baby is paramount. Life is going to give me whatever it wants, and I truly do understand that, but I will still love my baby unconditionally. 

    Thanks again for the information regarding different TTC strategies and words of encouragement. 
    Nope. I flagged you, but thanks for name calling again.


  • Yeah, because 29 is totes ancient. 


    And yes, take your prenatal. You should have started months ago. 

    You are having a 4 day surge because you have enough LH in your urine to turn the test positive for 4 days. Temping is only complicated if you like turning little things into the OMG worst thing ever.


    Haha. Omg, I missed the 29 year old comment. How will op take care of her baby in the nursing home!!

    You know, I was actually thinking about the baby. After 30, the chance of Down Syndrome increases.

    But thanks. For everything. So helpful and encouraging. 
    This is so incredibly offensive!!! If I had a baby with a disability, I would still love him/her regardless! Anyone who is over 30 should be offended at this statement!





    Yeah, I don't see how this is offensive. The comment was frankly kind of stupid, but that has been pointed out several times, and OP agreed.
    Coffee Bean Born 6/13/15.
    2nd round exp 8/20/18.
    Meow.
  • "I guess I'm kind of hoping for some wisdom from current Bumpers (Bumpies? Is that the correct term? If it's not,I sincerely apologize!).

    What worked for you?
    we had sex whenever we wanted to. I charted on & off, but my sleep schedule & breast feeding made that a pain in the butt for me. Fertility Friend has great tutorials that explain everything. I highly recommend looking into that. Honestly? We kept it simple & got lucky. That's it.

    Should I be taking a pre-natal already? I say yes. Folic Acid is essential & it's a great idea to get in the habit. I use the Target brand gummies

    And I know this was kind of addressed in a previous post, but what might cause a 4-day LH surge (the sticks are not expired)?"
    Are you sure you are reading the ovulation strip correctly? You ovulate once in a 24 hour period (most drastic increase in LH right before). If the lines are not super dark you could be misinterpreting them. I've only ever used the "smiley face" type of predictor, but I got annoyed at the cost of that one. That might be a better option for you if you find the darkness of the lines are confusing for you.


    LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:



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  • Take your prenatals and keep your head high. I feel like on this site you have to take the good with the bad. There are quite a few people who seem to be looking for a fight, or really just don't understand that sometimes we are new at this. Quite frankly it IS overwhelming looking at all that goes into ttc. Temping...opks. ...cm...I think many..if not all of us think that as soon as you get off bc touchdown you're pregnant. I mean after all we spend our early twenties being told if we miss one pill we will get pregnant or if heaven forbid we have antibiotics we will probably get pregnant. Come to find out that's not at all how it goes. I mean not only do we have to learn when our fw is we also have to understand that it changes every month lol. My first post on here I got torn apart as well.
    Just know not everyone on here is mean and try not to stress about the whole process. There are plenty of us who are right there with you. Overwhelmed and really frustrated that the place you are supposed to be able to voice your concerns is full of mean people.

    Which is why I broke it down to the bare basics to keep in mind. Honest ==/== mean. Public forum = you take what you get.
  • BritniB86 said:

    I'd like to point out that I don't think BBT is easy for me personally because of how insanely tired I generally am when I wake up. No matter my sleep schedule, I'm unconscious until I get into my shower.
    Everyone is different with what comes easy to them. No need to make them feel bad about themselves, especially when they are expressing that they are overwhelmed to start.
    "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." <3</p>



    How are you going to get up with a screaming baby in the middle of the night if you can't even open your eyes for half a minute to take your temp??
  • Eh, it's a priorities thing. I will get up for very important things and be 100% alert but on regular days, I'll look over at my alarm clock and realized I've pushed snooze for a good hour already. Also, I have a husband and lastly, I'm very paranoid about certain things. If I need to wake up for my baby, I will. Temping is not a life or death kind of situation, but thank you for your concern.
  • No problem
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