Adjusting to being a mommy of 2...does it get easier?

Heatherlowry9

this has been such a rough couple of weeks. I had a repeat c-section on Jan 19 due to baby being breech. My husband is home with me for 3 weeks and my older daughter (almost 4) is extremely attached to him.
Well I came home from the hospital on a Wednesday and came down with a terrible cold by Monday. I've been blowing my nose and coughing like crazy! Just as I start to feel better yesterday (friday) I come down with pink eye! So I'm trying to take care of baby, I'm trying to stay away from my older daughter so she doesn't get pink eye and I'm just miserable. I can't enjoy my new baby because I don't want her getting sick. Plus with all this sickness I lost my voice. I tend to be the more disciplinary of my husband and I and being voiceless I've been out of everything. My husbnd will be home with us 1 more week, but my concern is when he returns to work and I'm on my own. I'm afraid I'll have to deal with tantrums and more all while trying to care for the baby too. My husband works nights so I'll be in charge of bedtime all by my self. Anyone have any suggestions/recommendations to prepare my daughter for daddy returning to work? How to setup a bedtime routine for 2 kids? Please tell me it will be easier than this terrible week being sick!
Thanks!

CalBears

Give yourself a break;You're recovering from a c-section and you've been sick! When you recover, it will be much easier to handle the challenges of two kids. It takes a little while to come up with a new schedule but it definitely gets easier with time. We had three kids in five years. It took us a little practice to handle the multiplicity!

I found it difficult to read bedtime stories to my older child while the baby was still cranky and craving my attention. If you can get the baby to sleep first, maybe your older child can enjoy your one on one attention at bedtime.

PrimRoseMama

"If you can get the baby to sleep first, maybe your older child can enjoy your one on one attention at bedtime."

^^ echoing PP. It's hard until #2 gets mobile to divide your attention, but you will get the hang of it. I also think you should give yourself a break. You just gave birth & you've been sick. Add the adjustment period-- you're human.

tbmadeamistake

I second the PP as well, try to grab alone time with the older child during naps.  I had my second when the first was 25 months.  The hardest part for me was balancing their needs.  Sometimes it still is, the younger is only 8 months.  It does get easier and easier as they get older.  Ask for help when you need it, with anything, and even with house stuff.  Tell you older child that you love her when you can't physically hold her.  Lots of verbal love and encouragement go a long way.  Take care of yourself as well, as much as you can!  I think for me we hit a sweet spot around 5-6 months, but I had a cranky baby with feeding problems and reflux and it took that long to get him on a good feeding/sleeping system. 

grownorth

Yes it will get easier!

ilovemygirls

It does get easier, but it takes time.  I personally had a hard time adjusting to having a 2.5 yr old & a newborn- those ages were too close for me in retrospect.  You are very lucky to have your husband home for a long time (mine was back at work the next day!)- use that help to the max.  You will do just fine on your own- we all do, it just takes time.  Maybe give your 4yo some tasks so to help w/baby.  All in all- you just gave birth & then on top of it got sick. That sucks!  Give yourself some grace and take it one day at a time. 

wino2006

It gets so much easier! These days are fleeting. My girls have the same age difference. So DD1 was almost 4 when DD2 was born. We did the same bedroom routine with DD1, DD2 just joined us and I tried to incorporate DD2 into DD1's routine asap-like baths, bedtime story etc. When I gave DD1 a bath, I would put DD2 in the tub with her. DD1 would help hold her up while I bathed her. You get really good at multi-tasking. I would nurse DD2 while reading a book to DD1 if DD2 got fussy. I used the carrier a lot and that was helpful for trips to the library and park. Don't put too much stress on yourself. You have a newborn so these are the days of just surviving. I know it doesn't help to hear this, but it does go fast. I feel like it was yesterday and I was in your shoes. Now I have an almost 5 and almost 9 year old. Sisters who are the best of friends. You gave them the priceless gift of each other. DD1 doesn't remember the lack of time I had to spend with her when DD2 was a newborn and yours won't either. Snuggle in, enjoy your precious littles and watch the beautiful relationship between your girls blossom. It is so worth it. 

michellersayer

hey! I had 2 c sections also. my son is 3 my daughter is 15 months old. it's hard.. bedtime Is ALWAYS at 8:00 every single night. for BOTH kids. keeping them on the same schedule is important. my husband is gone 5am-9pm mon-from so I do it all by myself! good luck honey! I know it's hard!