Hosting dilemma

marirosem07

When I first told my family at 20 weeks that I was expecting, my brother (the prodigal host with the most) was the first one to offer to host a shower for me. 7 weeks later, however, he hasn't mentioned it again to me, or changes the subject when I bring it up. Everybody keeps asking me about my shower and I tell them I think he's hosting it. Recently my bf's mother graciously offered to help put some money towards the cost of the shower and friends have also offered to help with the hosting but I am hesitant to give them my brothers info since he seems to be avoiding the planning. I'm 27 weeks now, and feel like shower planning should definitely be underway, but nothing seems to be. Would it be weird if I just start doing my own planning, and have my brother be involved as much as he wants to be or just ask him if he would rather my friends host something for me instead?

ombradellarosa

marirosem07 said:

When I first told my family at 20 weeks that I was expecting, my brother (the prodigal host with the most) was the first one to offer to host a shower for me. 7 weeks later, however, he hasn't mentioned it again to me, or changes the subject when I bring it up. Everybody keeps asking me about my shower and I tell them I think he's hosting it. Recently my bf's mother graciously offered to help put some money towards the cost of the shower and friends have also offered to help with the hosting but I am hesitant to give them my brothers info since he seems to be avoiding the planning. I'm 27 weeks now, and feel like shower planning should definitely be underway, but nothing seems to be. Would it be weird if I just start doing my own planning, and have my brother be involved as much as he wants to be or just ask him if he would rather my friends host something for me instead?

DO NOT start planning your own. Especially not with so many people offering to host for you.

Since your brother did offer, I would think it would be okay to gently and politely ask him about it. Let him know that it's okay with you if he doesn't want to do it anymore. Don't approach this as "Hey since you haven't done anything can my friends do it instead?" but more like, "Hey, I appreciate so much that you offered to throw me a shower. Is that still something you're interested in? It's all right if not, I still appreciate it and it's okay if you've changed your mind."

Not sure what you mean by calling him "the prodigal host with the most"? Please explain.

marirosem07

prodigal host with the most - just meant that he always throws the best parties for whatever the occasion

VOR

NO, you can not plan your own. As him if he still wants to host. If not, the next time someone asks, you can simply say "there is no shower being planned that Iknow of" and then one of these people who previously offered may re-offer.

Helenahhandbasket

I think it's OK to tactfully ask him his plans, but am I the only on that thinks it's sort of weird a man would offer to host a baby shower? 

I don't think my brother even knows what a baby shower is.

marirosem07

It's going to be a coed shower for me and my SO, as are the majority of the showers I've been to lately, so it's not weird at all that my brother wants to host it. Also, this is the first LO on my side of the family so he's also super excited to become an uncle and wants to do as much as he can to help.