Trying to stay calm... My world is crashing around me. *Update*

Holly317

I've never posted here but I read everyday. I'm a ftm, and to say this pregnancy has been rough is an understatement. At 18wks we found out that our baby girl has downs syndrome. It was a shock but we have gotten to a good place and now are just excited to meet her. Last week we were told her percentile dropped in half in just 4 weeks (35th to 18th), we go next Tuesday to see how she is but we might have to get her out (we are 34wks today). I keep a strong face on but inside I'm going crazy. Then yesterday my father had a heart attack. He is unresponsive, on a respirator and we don't know yet if he has any brain damage or if he will make it through. Again I'm trying to keep a strong face. My poor mom is a reck and I just want to be strong. All I can think is I can't bury my father before I have this little girl. She has to know her grandfather! My husband is a saint, I don't know what I'd do without him. I think I'm at my breaking point. I bent down earlier today to pull my sock off and I threw my back out. I literally can't stand straight, laying down locks it up, and Tylenol barely touches it. How much can one person take!?! Sorry this is so long, I didn't have anywhere else to vent...

*Update*
First, I need to thank you all for your kind words and encouragement. Today has been one of the worst days of my life but reading your posts has brought some smiles and relief.

This morning my dad starting seazing. They did many tests and it was determined that he was brain dead. We made the difficult choice to remove him from the ventilator and not let him suffer. He passed away at 5:55pm. He would have celebrated his 69th birthday on Christmas day.

I'm still in disbelief. I know he's gone, but it doesn't seem real. I can't believe that my daughter will never know her grandpop. That's when I lose it most, thinking about having this baby and him not there.

I will update again after our ultrasound Tuesday if there are any changes with Olivia (baby girls name).

Mom2anAngel2

((HUGS)). I am so very sorry for everything that you are going through. Sending many T&Ps to you and your family.

brickcitylove

HUGS. That's a lot. Crying helps me. Sometimes you just got to get it out. Also, go to the chiropractor for your back. A good one can work wonders. T&Ps!!

SSCmomma

Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

snowbaby1214

Hugs to you.  I hope your dad pulls through and your back feels better.  Keeping you in my thoughts.

britb618

I'm so sorry- I wouldn't be standing after all you've gone through. You are obviously very strong. Prayers that your father wakes up okay and that your appointment goes well. Please feel free to reach out if you need anyone to talk to we are all here

funinthenorth

This is a lot for one person to deal with.  Thank goodness for your husband, lean on him when you need to let it all out.  He'll be there and understand.

Thinking of you.

SheHulk723

Sending lots of T&P and hugs.  You're going through so much and I just can't imagine how difficult it must be.  Hoping things get better for you and your family!

LeannCochran

I'm so sorry. Lots of thoughts and prayers headed your way!

liladelphia215

I'm so sorry you are having a hard time

pleirey

@Holly317, tons of thoughts and prayers for you and your family!  I would have hit my breaking point at this point, too, or long before.  Believe me, if you need a place to vent and just let it all out, this is an amazing group to turn to for advice, support, and funny GIF parties for distraction.  Sending creepy internet hugs your way!

readyforround2

I'm so sorry you are dealing with so much. You have more strength than you realize. Many thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

dash419

Sending positive thoughts your way.

Jamie02Lee

Sending T+P.. GL!!

LadyXaverian

I'm so sorry for everything you're going through. Sending T&P for you, your Dad, and your baby girl. 

MKateG

Hugs! I'm so sorry your having suck a hard time. Sending T&Ps your way

speu511000

You will soon have a beautiful little girl who is lucky to have such a strong momma and family around her!! Thoughts and prayers with you, God only provides what he knows you can handle. You will be one rockin momma soon!

kellyfo14

So sorry you have to go through all this right now. It isn't fair that sometimes the world hands us more than we can handle. Glad to hear you have a supportive husband. Don't be afraid to lean on him. Please keep us posted. Prayers for your Dad.

iheartichi

Prayers coming your way for you, your dad and your little girl. Hang in there and take care of yourself. If you need to let it all out, then let it all out.

ShuShubee

That is a lot to handle all at once. Thoughts and prayers for your family and your dad.

misslizzy82

You're in my thoughts and prayers.  I'm glad your husband is supportive!  We're here if you need to break down, you can't be strong for everyone... you need to let it out in order to heal yourself!

Milagros315

I'm so sorry for all that you're going through. Hugs, thoughts and prayers for you.

Edvent

So sorry to hear about all that you're going through. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family!

soon2bejp

I'm so sorry. Please use us as support in any way possible. Will be thinking about you!

mali3

Sending positive thoughts your way! My heart goes out to you in this difficult time, stay strong mama and keep us posted!

LuckyPenny1231

I'm so sorry. That is a lot for someone to go through. Many hugs and you are in my thoughts. I really hope your dad pulls through and gets to meet his beautiful granddaughter.

SRose1005

So sorry you're going through all this. You, your dad and your little one are in my thoughts and prayers!

jennielynn+

Ugh, this is just unpleasant all around. I hope, at the very least, you can get some relief for your back. Take the time you need and ask for help where you can, preferably outside the family. That way you can really be there for your parents when you are feeling better. 

Pregnancy is a stressful time for everyone but, what you have on your plate is way above average! I think you have a lot more strength than you know right now. I hope you, husband and baby girl can get through this first trial as a family! Happy thoughts for your dad and a best case scenario. 

MamacitaChiquita82

Sending lots of good thoughts your way. You sound very strong but it's okay to take some time for yourself to process everything and to just let out all of the emotions you're feeling. I'm glad you posted. Hugs!

idontevenknow

Wow, @Holly317‌. So sorry to read this. Thinkingbof you and your at this time. I'm hoping that your dad comes through. Don't be afraid to break down. It may help you feel better, and get through.

schnitz9

sending you lots of love from F15 as well.  You can always come vent to us too for double the loving from both BMBs 

longcat07

(((hugs)))  that's too much for one person.  all the T&P that your father pulls through so he can meet his granddaughter and that baby girl either can stay put a while longer, or that she does really well if she has to come out early.  silly question, but have you tried ice and/or heat on your back?

4littlebears

I am also so sorry for what you are going through. That seems like too much for one person to bear. I'm sending you and your family many prayers! Lean on your husband and take care of yourself.

BackseatDriver

I'm so sorry! That is a lot to go through. Good thoughts for you and your family.

Pips09

I'm so sorry that you are dealing with so much.

theyazzmatazz

((Hugs)) you and your family will definitely be our family's prayers today. I'm sorry you are going through such a difficult time but Don't despair, God can work miracles!

peggels24

Sending you lots of T&P's

KerBear8

You have support from the board. T&P to you and your family.

Disneygeek77

I am so sorry.  What a terrible time.  

bkmama

This sounds so rough. I am so sorry. If you need support, please don't hesitate to reach out to any of us. Sending best wishes your way.

tripletoe

I'm so sorry you are dealing with all this. I will be thinking of you and your family.