Elective ultrasound etiquette question

catlover790

Hi everyone!

I've noticed in the updates and AW posts that some of you have had an elective ultrasound done to find out if you are having a boy or girl. My question is; did you tell/call your OB to tell them you are having one done? I didn't know if it was something I should do, or just mention at my next appointment? Or not say anything about it? I didn't know if OBs are not happy people do these now; just curious about what you've done/if your OB cared.

At first we weren't going to do one but then there was a mix-up and we weren't able to have the NT scan done, and I really would like to see the baby again before 21w for the AS.

Also, if you had an elective ultrasound were you worried they would find something wrong but not say anything during the appointment? I know they aren't doctors, so I understand that they won't make a diagnosis I was just wondering what your thoughts were when you decided to get the ultrasound done. Did you worry about it at all? Thanks in advance!

lilann2011

No worries at all just went to find out the sex! I don't tell my OB, don't think there is a reason for them to know and didn't with my first child either. And honestly I think they wouldn't care at all.
I don't think an elective place would ever tell you something is wrong as they aren't doctors they are just looking to see the sex and that's it.
Stop worrying and ENJOY!!

catlover790

lilann2011 said:

No worries at all just went to find out the sex! I don't tell my OB, don't think there is a reason for them to know and didn't with my first child either. And honestly I think they wouldn't care at all. I don't think an elective place would ever tell you something is wrong as they aren't doctors they are just looking to see the sex and that's it. Stop worrying and ENJOY!!

Thanks! The "stop worrying" has been the hardest part about pregnancy for me! I'm trying, really I am! ">

n0soup4u

We went last night to find out. It was a very fun appointment. I did not tell my OB that we decided to have an elective ultrasound. She wouldn't have cared regardless. You could always mention it at your next appointment if you wanted.

catlover790

mbm1983 said:

Just wanted to find out the sex and see a heartbeat again. I didn't tell my ob. He wouldn't have cared anyways because it really isn't a big deal. Doesn't bother me they don't tell you anything about health of the child because that's not what i'm there for. My elective lasts about 5 minutes and really you are just excited to find out and see it jumping around in there so there's no time to worry about other stuff.

Thanks! Thanks for mentioning the timing, I didn't think how fast it will probably go!

emarsh0415

Elective u/s are something that my Doctors office offers. We did have to an appointment ahead of time, so that the tech had us on her schedule. We were able to get the elective u/s scheduled with my normal monthly appointment.

I wasn't worried about them finding something wrong. The only thing that she checked was the heartbeat. She did say that the baby isn't really big enough at this time to do an anatomy check.

PinkDahLia44

I did a 3D elective with my last. OB didn't mind (it was actually at the hospital with the AS US tech). I told her only because we were making conversation.

redneckmomma25

I told my OB at my Tuesday appointment that we had gone and it was a boy. I don't think you have to. I definitely don't think you need to run it by them or ask their permission.  I always have a worry about them finding something. I knew that this was really only to find out the sex of the baby and listen to the heart beat. I definitely worries there would be no heart beat. But all seemed to be well and they will do a more thorough ultrasound at my A/S. 

specialsn0wflake

I mentioned possibly doing one to my MW at my appt this morning, only because the place here requires proof of on going prenatal care by having your OB sign a waiver before they will agree to see you.  She had zero issue with it.  I doubt they would really be upset if you did it.  Tell them or not, they likely won't mind at all.  

catlover790

redneckmomma25 said:

I told my OB at my Tuesday appointment that we had gone and it was a boy. I don't think you have to. I definitely don't think you need to run it by them or ask their permission.  I always have a worry about them finding something. I knew that this was really only to find out the sex of the baby and listen to the heart beat. I definitely worries there would be no heart beat. But all seemed to be well and they will do a more thorough ultrasound at my A/S. 

Thank you for your response! Yes, I was worried not so much about finding abnormalities with the anatomy of the baby but not finding a heartbeat. I have my 16w check up at the beginning of next week so I think if everything seems okay, then I'll schedule with the elective place.

catlover790

Thanks for all your responses! I think like usual I'm probably over-thinking everything! "> It sounds like you all had good experiences, and my H really wants to do one soon so I think I will schedule one. Thanks for the advice!

vickersh1

emarsh0415 said:

Elective u/s are something that my Doctors office offers. We did have to an appointment ahead of time, so that the tech had us on her schedule. We were able to get the elective u/s scheduled with my normal monthly appointment. I wasn't worried about them finding something wrong. The only thing that she checked was the heartbeat. She did say that the baby isn't really big enough at this time to do an anatomy check.

Same here. My OB office offered to do an elective u/s that we paid for out of pocket. Saw the same u/s tech that we normally do. I saw her first, found out it was a girl, and then had the appt with the Dr.

BBS!

My 3d ultrasound last 30 mins but was during my 3rd trimester when there was more to see. I know someone who had low amniotic fluid and they told her to go to the doctor or ER immediately. Again it was during the 3rd tri.

kerimontanye

I told my dr and he could care less if I wanted to do it, just said the pictures wouldn't look as good as if I waited till 25+ weeks. My appointment lasted 30 minutes and was pretty cool. They didn't say anything about it health wise, just pointed everything out and tried to get me some good pictures.

arlinar

Out here it depends on the place your doing it at. Some of the places you have to have your doctors approval to do an elective or even a 4d scan with your family. I found out though through the harmony test what I'm having but i defiantly would like to do a 4d scan in the future.

picklesx

I'm confused - they will check the genitals at the anatomy scan anyway, so why pay for another ultrasound just to find out the sex? Is it an impatience thing? I haven't heard of people doing this but would rather just wait until the anatomy scan which my insurance covers. And this is coming from the most impatient person in the world.

redneckmomma25

picklesx said:

I'm confused - they will check the genitals at the anatomy scan anyway, so why pay for another ultrasound just to find out the sex? Is it an impatience thing? I haven't heard of people doing this but would rather just wait until the anatomy scan which my insurance covers. And this is coming from the most impatient person in the world.

Yes. Impatience. I'd rather know 4 weeks early. Almost 5 since my a/s isn't until 20w5d. $85 was worth it to me. 

jmhansen11

I didn't tell my OB- I also really think if there was something seriously wrong, like no hb they would say something or at least contact your doc to follow up with you. I have gone a couple times just because it helps ease some anxiety between OB visits. I think I mostly don't wanna tell my OB because I don't want them to know what a headache I am

BigAppleBiggerBelly

I had one last time at 17 weeks and didn't tell my midwife. It was 30 minutes, and I really enjoyed it because the tech was focused on making it fun and commenting on what baby was doing (clutching his penis with both hands!), rather than focusing on medical issues like a hospital u/s.

mrsalvidrez

I didn't tell my ob but only because I didn't even think about it being an issue. I don't think he will mind.

BigAppleBiggerBelly

picklesx said:

I'm confused - they will check the genitals at the anatomy scan anyway, so why pay for another ultrasound just to find out the sex? Is it an impatience thing? I haven't heard of people doing this but would rather just wait until the anatomy scan which my insurance covers. And this is coming from the most impatient person in the world.

I had one last pregnancy at 17 weeks because I was traveling weeks 19-21 and couldn't schedule my a/s until week 22. I wanted to know before our trip so I could pick up a sex-appropriate souvenir. Also, Thanksgiving fell before that, and we wanted to tell our families then.

It was around $50.

EssJayCee

I had my elective scan done at my OB office, however the standalone facilities that do elective scans here all require a prior scan by a doctor and information from the doctor to schedule.

MPKbaby237

I also did not get a NT- personal decision though. We decided to go to an elective scan center, and I shared the pics with my doctor for two reasons. One- I wanted to see her reaction regarding the baby size. To me, the baby looks huge so early on. I'm afraid of a large one at birth-- runs in the family. Two- I wanted to see if she also agreed with the sex prediction since I'm only 16 weeks.
As it turns out, she was full of smiles. She confirmed the sex and that everything seemed perfectly normal based off what I presented, but to wait for an actual medical opinion at 20 weeks. I respect her response and I'm happy that I shared the pics with her for ease of mind.

ScarletOflaherty

picklesx said:

I'm confused - they will check the genitals at the anatomy scan anyway, so why pay for another ultrasound just to find out the sex? Is it an impatience thing? I haven't heard of people doing this but would rather just wait until the anatomy scan which my insurance covers. And this is coming from the most impatient person in the world.

Which says you just want to know the sex, end of story. Getting an elective isn't just about finding that out, it's about the experience. You anatomy scan tech isn't going to take their time showing you the face, the feet, and any angle you want for almost as long as you want, along with making sure you get great still shots. They aren't going to go back and check two, three, four times if you ask just to make sure they got the sex of the baby right. They aren't going to sit there for 5 minutes so you get great video footage of the baby having hiccups or sucking their thumb. In fact most of the time you won't get video at all, and the pics are at the mercy of the tech, so they may be good, they may not. 

The anatomy scan is a medical procedure, and is treated like one. It's over with quickly(my last one was 15 minutes or just under), the pics are you get what you get, and checking for sex is just one quick look. I've known several people who were told wrong or not able to find out(baby's legs crossed) at their anatomy scan but have not known one yet who were told wrong or not told at an elective, because they are much more thorough, and let you come back for free within a week if it can't be determined.

For some of us that experience is absolutely worth the money

catlover790

picklesx said:

I'm confused - they will check the genitals at the anatomy scan anyway, so why pay for another ultrasound just to find out the sex? Is it an impatience thing? I haven't heard of people doing this but would rather just wait until the anatomy scan which my insurance covers. And this is coming from the most impatient person in the world.

For us, it is partly not wanting to wait but also other reasons. My H has difficulty taking time off from work so for this we can go on a Saturday which will be nice for him. Also, although we wanted to we weren't able to have the NT scan done so it's just been a lot of time since my last ultrasound; I'm a worrier so we thought this might help me relax and be able to be really excited after. I've also been waiting to announce to friends and my students and really wanted to confirm everything looked okay before hand.

I called my OB before to ask about the AS and they said they'll schedule it for 21 weeks which just seems so far away!

thelittlepear

I went at 30+ weeks with DD. They took the name of your OB when you were there, and said they wouldn't necessarily tell you if they saw something abnormal (unless you needed to go the ER immediately), but they would contact your OB if they had concerns.

Amandysergio

Didn't tell my ob with DD or with this one (just had it yesterday). I am a very impatient person and DDs closet is filled with boxes of girl clothes. So instead of waiting 4 more weeks, I wanted to know now if I'm re-washing her things or donating them and I totally agree with @ScarletOflaherty‌ 100%. The tech I had yesterday was great and let us see our son wiggling around in 4D and checked 3 times to make sure he is really a boy lol. You don't get that when you go for your AS since it's a medical procedure.

picklesx

redneckmomma25 said:

picklesx said:

I'm confused - they will check the genitals at the anatomy scan anyway, so why pay for another ultrasound just to find out the sex? Is it an impatience thing? I haven't heard of people doing this but would rather just wait until the anatomy scan which my insurance covers. And this is coming from the most impatient person in the world.

Yes. Impatience. I'd rather know 4 weeks early. Almost 5 since my a/s isn't until 20w5d. $85 was worth it to me. 

ScarletOflaherty said:

picklesx said:

I'm confused - they will check the genitals at the anatomy scan anyway, so why pay for another ultrasound just to find out the sex? Is it an impatience thing? I haven't heard of people doing this but would rather just wait until the anatomy scan which my insurance covers. And this is coming from the most impatient person in the world.

Which says you just want to know the sex, end of story. Getting an elective isn't just about finding that out, it's about the experience. You anatomy scan tech isn't going to take their time showing you the face, the feet, and any angle you want for almost as long as you want, along with making sure you get great still shots. They aren't going to go back and check two, three, four times if you ask just to make sure they got the sex of the baby right. They aren't going to sit there for 5 minutes so you get great video footage of the baby having hiccups or sucking their thumb. In fact most of the time you won't get video at all, and the pics are at the mercy of the tech, so they may be good, they may not. 

The anatomy scan is a medical procedure, and is treated like one. It's over with quickly(my last one was 15 minutes or just under), the pics are you get what you get, and checking for sex is just one quick look. I've known several people who were told wrong or not able to find out(baby's legs crossed) at their anatomy scan but have not known one yet who were told wrong or not told at an elective, because they are much more thorough, and let you come back for free within a week if it can't be determined.

For some of us that experience is absolutely worth the money

First of all, I didn't intend at all for my post to come off as condescending and I apologize to those who have interpreted as such. As far as the anatomy scan goes, no, I am not going for the sole purpose of finding out the sex. While that is something I am looking forward to, I also want to be able to see that everything is developing properly. And yes, it is a medical procedure and should be treated as such. I'm sorry that you felt that yours was rushed and that the technician didn't take the time to point out or explain or listen. When I had the anatomy scan while pregnant with my son, our technician pointed out everything that they checked, explained what they were looking for, gave us tons of prints (as well as copies to share with family and oftentimes going back to get a better angle), took her time and answered any questions we had. It has been the same professionalism and courtesy I have had at all of my ultrasounds and I think it's terrible for any technician or doctor to not afford everyone that courtesy.

catlover790

@picklesx‌ I didn't take your post as condescending or anything, but thanks for clarifying anyway! I just didn't want it to seem like the only reason we're going is because we're impatient. I guess that's part of it, but I think the biggest part for me is that I don't want to tell more people until we see the heartbeat again and if I wait until 20w that's a long time to not tell people.

It's nice that you had a great experience with your anatomy scan! I have had friends who have gotten lots of good pictures from theirs also; and some who didn't. I think it just depends.

c+est+la+vie

The primary reason my husband and I are opting for an elective ultrasound is for the DVD and CD to share with family who live over 4000 km away from us. The secondary reason, and I scheduled it 2 weeks after my anatomy scan, is as a backup to find out the sex of our baby. This particular extra cost is worth it to us.

I did tell my OB/Gyn at my last appointment because I wanted him to know. The only negative thing my OB/Gyn had to say about an elective ultrasound (if you're wanting a DVD of the visit and pictures on a CD + gender [they label it gender, not me] determination) is the cost.

However, my OB/Gyn did mention the potential of ending up with a busy, overworked ultrasound technician. He said it really will depend on the tech I end up with. I may, or may not, get a (single) 3D picture and I may only get a 15 minute appointment. The 15-20 minute appointment length is stated on the paper I received from my first ultrasound, as well. Along with the note that there may, or may not, be enough time for my husband to see.

taramanter

My doctor has ultrasound machines on site and they take a look anytime I ask in between the regular ultrasounds done for measuring. They asked us to bring a previous report to any other ultrasound appointments (like if we choose to go and pay for a 3D one since the office doesn't offer one) just so that the technician kind of has an idea of what is going on already incase they notice a major concern that you are not aware of.