I'm going to pat myself on the back right now.

wifeofadam

MIL called DH last night and said she was coming over tonight with my SIL.  DH didn't tell me until breakfast this morning.  Old me would have flipped out trying to get the house clean for their visit and called them to see if they also wanted to have dinner with us.  New me has not done one thing to clean this place up and did not call. 

I've come a long way.  It's refreshing to not care what your MIL thinks of you anymore.  I have four kids and can't get this place visit ready with less than 24 hours notice without stressing myself out.  She's got to learn that somehow.

Feel free to pat yourself on the back for something here, too.

wifeofadam

OK.  Scratch that.  MIL just called and basically invited herself over for dinner, so I now have to lift a finger and do something.

Sigh.

kleigh926

wifeofadam said:

OK.  Scratch that.  MIL just called and basically invited herself over for dinner, so I now have to lift a finger and do something.

Sigh.

No you don't. Tell her you didn't have enough notice to get dinner ready for her. That's really incredibly rude to invite yourself over for dinner when a person has 4 young children.

SummerLove21

My mom is in town for the week. I'll give her a pat on the back for not making any comments about my cooking, appearance, house cleanliness, or new paint colors (mostly).

I'm giving myself a pat on the back for resting guilt-free today. Usually if I am resting, I'm having serious arguments with myself about it and end the day feeling like a lazy slob with no self-motivation. Today I am giving myself a break.

ETA: And I agree with @kleigh926; tell her you already made preparations for dinner and you don't have enough for her too, though she is welcome to pick up her own dinner and eat with you all.

holly321

Dh and I are fighting. Nothing BG, but 100% him being a jerk. Last night, he tried to act like nothing was happening, and I wouldn't have it. He likes to do that instead of apologizing. Way too often, I can be a pushover and just let him. I wouls usually still make him dinner and stuff. But not this time, I just made and fed the kids dinner. I know it is silly, but I pat myself on the back for not just letting him get away with stuff.


FTR, my husband isn't horrible or anything.

wifeofadam

Sagen said:

I agree with summerlove and kleigh. When I am put I that position I say it is restaurant time

I wish I could.  We have serious food issues and allergies in the house, so restaurants aren't an option.

She and SIL came for dinner.  I didn't do anything fancy.  I just cooked what we were planning to have for dinner and that was that. 

They just left.......an hour after the kids' normal bedtime. 

One day I'll have the cojones to say no. 

kleigh926

My pat on the back is that even though I feel like I'm failing at being a good mom sometimes and wish I could have done better, that must not be true because DD said "I love you" to me at bedtime tonight for the first time. It was unprompted and she dove into my arms to hug me before she said it. I almost died of cuteness and I teared up.

Oh, AND!!! I got her to sit on her potty with the lid up today for the first time! She'd always been scared of falling in before. Maybe soon we can start real potty training if she's ready!

SidraJedi

I am a perfectionist have a short fuse (to put my issues in one sort of nutshell) and today at dinner DH said "you seem so mellow and happy and together yesterday and today even though you've been tired."

It made me feel good bc I have been making an effort to let go of things I obsess over unnecessarily and just look at the bottom line. I've really been trying to change my perspective and become more chill so his comment made me feel like I'd started to accomplish my goals.

tamarar5

I got my kitchen cleaned!

It was a complete disaster, and I'm embarrassed and ashamed to admit how long it took, but it's clean. I'm taking baby steps here, but I'm going to force myself to do the dishes tomorrow — so were leaving the kitchen clean when we go to the funeral tomorrow.

Poppy523

I have one I finally had the natural birth I wanted so badly. With DD1 she was a face presentation which apparently required an immediate transfer to the hospital and once there I was strapped to a bed with an internal monitor on her because she was struggling so badly. This baby was posterior but I actually managed to labor at home all day walk across a parking lot while in transition just in time to push. It was at a hospital which was not my ideal but DH was scared after our last emergency transfer so I couldn't blame him. I did, at one point, announce I had to use the bathroom and my dr told me that most women think they have to as the baby descends and she also told me that most women also do it in the bed at which point I asked DH not to look in case I did. While my midwife didn't get to deliver because I went so fast, the staff was wonderful and she made it there in time to hold my leg and cheer and the Dr. Was all relaxed and smiles the whole way. I feel so strong and and happy. Baby went to my chest as opposed to the NICU after birth and he is nursing like a champ. This is so much different than my first delivery, which still makes me sad to think about, but today I am happy for this healthy baby and no tearing for mommy!

tamarar5

Yay again, @Poppy523‌! So glad you had the experience you hoped for.

Poppy523

DC2London said:

I ran 4 miles, pushing a stroller, this week.  Win.

That is awesome!! Does this mean Rhys is riding better in the stroller for you? I remember he was giving you trouble a while back.

Amstreagle

I want to pat myself on the back for letting things go more often. I point out petty things that irk me to dh which usually starts a fight. I've really learned you have to pick your battles and have a trusting relationship. As long as he's a good husband and father the rest can be let go. If something interferes with that then it's worth discussing but I don't need to act like his mother.

Poppy523

DC2London said:

Poppy523 said:

DC2London said:

I ran 4 miles, pushing a stroller, this week.  Win.

That is awesome!! Does this mean Rhys is riding better in the stroller for you? I remember he was giving you trouble a while back.

YES @Poppy523 it was actually your suggestion that helped.  I got Jack to ride his bike right in front of us, and I turned on 1D (their favorite) on my phone and put my phone in the cupholder rather than using headphones.  If he could see Jack, and I kept good music playing and kept moving, he was content.  Then his language explosion came and he really enjoyed pointing out various things along the way (I try to stick to busy roads so he can point out buses, trucks, etc).  Now he has learned where the playgrounds are along our various routes so he knows, based on which way we are going, that there is a playground waiting for him at the end of the jog if he behaves  It's brilliant.

That's awesome, I'm so glad it worked! The playground idea is perfect, I am going to work that into our routes when I can start running again!