December 2014 Moms
xc1148
member
Things you'd "never" do...
xc1148
member
I thought it would be fun since it's almost December and we all have grand plans for life with baby 
Rather than just a laundry list of the usual "I thought I'd never..." we can list things you actually stuck with, too.
STMs:
1) One thing you said you'd never do and actually stuck to the plan
2) One thing you said you'd never do, and did within about 3 days (or 3 months)
FTMs:
1) One thing you would like to avoid that you feel you really can achieve (either because that's how your family/friends do it, or you're committed)
2) One thing you'd like to do but you're not sure if you'll be able to
I'll start! FTM
1) I'd really like to avoid overprocessed and junk food, and build good eating habits. Spending time with my friends that do baby led weaning and cook together as couples has reassured me that while it's not easy all the time, kids do like good food and you can share one meal together
2) I'd like to limit screens/devices/tv time as long as possible...have no clue how that will go.
Rather than just a laundry list of the usual "I thought I'd never..." we can list things you actually stuck with, too.STMs:
1) One thing you said you'd never do and actually stuck to the plan
2) One thing you said you'd never do, and did within about 3 days (or 3 months)
FTMs:
1) One thing you would like to avoid that you feel you really can achieve (either because that's how your family/friends do it, or you're committed)
2) One thing you'd like to do but you're not sure if you'll be able to
I'll start! FTM
1) I'd really like to avoid overprocessed and junk food, and build good eating habits. Spending time with my friends that do baby led weaning and cook together as couples has reassured me that while it's not easy all the time, kids do like good food and you can share one meal together
2) I'd like to limit screens/devices/tv time as long as possible...have no clue how that will go.
TTC since June 2011
DH: perfect SA
Me: 30, moderate endo, unexplained infertility
IUI or IVF in December
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Things you'd "never" do...
FTM!
1. Limited screen time, fo sho. I am not a fan of kids pitching a fit unless they get to play with a phone or tablet.
2. No arguing! I am constantly surprised at how often I hear small kids arguing with their parents, about stuff like "put on your shoes because it's time to go", or "I don't want that for dinner", etc. I just don't recall being allowed to argue like that. I'm sure I sound naïve or STMs will laugh/get ruffled by this but seriously.
3. No "I'm going to count to three!" BS. This is kind of like #2 above. I about lose my bananas when I hear a toddler arguing and the mom goes "THREEEEE...." <eyeroll>.
BFP #1: EDD 8/18/2014 | MMC 1/28/14
BFP #2: EDD 12/29/14
STM
1) No tv time until she's a toddler (2+) and then very limited. I call no tv during the week and only just recently, two movies on the weekend pretty damn good. It used to be one movie for the entire weekend, but I need my rest
2) formula feed. But hey, I BF for 4 mo before she weaned by herself and when your milk never comes in no matter what you do/take, you feed your damn kid and let go of the guilt.
~after 34 cycles we finally got our 2nd little bundle of joy~
My IF blog
1) One thing you would like to avoid that you feel you really can achieve (either because that's how your family/friends do it, or you're committed)
BFP #1: EDD 8/18/2014 | MMC 1/28/14
BFP #2: EDD 12/29/14
2) One thing you said you'd never do, and did within about 3 days (or 3 months)
Bahaha. You're right. I laughed. Kids argue. It's normal for them to push boundaries and see what they can get away with. And many don't transition well when it's time to change gears. I have sweet kids but they can be assholes. Sometimes in public... And it's embarrassing. Counting to 3 is a whole "thing." There are entire books about it. No clue why but it works.
Back to the initial question, cosleeping was the main thing I said I'd never do and I did it with both previous kids.
It's amazing what you'll consider when you're desperate.
1) No sugary treats or junk before baby's first birthday cake.
My parenting strategy: No arguing with my toddler (he is welcome to voice his opinion and I acknowledge what he has said, but I don't go back and forth about it. Mama makes the rules.). I use mostly positive parenting strategies and try to focus on teaching positive behaviors versus punishing. Teaching independence has always been my "hill to die on". If my kids are capable of doing something for themselves, I do not do it for them.
2) Pacifiers: I swore my first would never have one. By two days old, I was begging him to take one. He had a really rough start and I would have done anything to find a simple solution to the constant crying. Sadly, he was determined not to take a pacifier no matter what. Talk about eating my words!!
Breastfeeding: I fully admit to being a total sanctimommy about this before I actually gave birth. I completely bought into the bs about "it's painless, easy and totally natural". I had no idea why anyone wouldn't do it. Lol!!! Let's just say my experience was the exact opposite of painless, easy, or natural. It just did not work at all despite my total commitment and effort. To those judgey bishes out there (my former self included): if formula didn't exist, both of my children would have starved to death.
Junk food: This is a half and half type deal. I never said "never" and my kids always get the "family meal" at dinner time. But lunches are much more "kid food" than I ever thought I would do. I stick with organic frozen chicken nuggets and organic Mac and Cheese type main courses with fruit and veggies. It's not like I am giving them total junk, but pre-kids I did have a strong attitude about allowing that kind of stuff. Live and learn.
1) One thing you would like to avoid that you feel you really can achieve (either because that's how your family/friends do it, or you're committed) I really, really want to avoid disposables & strictly cloth diaper (minus the first few weeks when he may be too small for the diapers. I"m trying to round up some newborn sized ones, but not really putting forth that much effort).
2) One thing you'd like to do but you're not sure if you'll be able to I registered for and received the machine and accessories to make your own baby food purees. I even got the contraption to fill your own sippy-food bags. I have high hopes, but my other mom-friends just give me that "Oh honey, you'll learn" look. I also want to try and limit screen time as much as we can, but in this day and age that seems tough.
I said I would never co-sleep and we didnt. She was in her own room from week 1 onward. I had her in the arms reach co-sleeper for the first week (mostly to appease my mom who bought it) and could not take it. She made too many noises and I was getting no sleep.
2) no paci. Even though I threatened to cut my mom's finger off, she did have the need to suck. Heaven sent. Unfortunately we are still stuck with the damn paci. She's going to go to college with the paci at this rate. I only let her indulge for bedtime but damn she loves that thing!
Married: 5/21/05 **~** Emery Aylin 6/30/12
BFP#1-11/5/10- Surgery for ectopic pregnancy 11/15/10 BFP#2-11/1/11 Due 7/8/12 Born 6/30/12
Oops we did it again... BFP 03/23/14 Due 12/6/14 Nora Born 11/23/14
2) One thing you'd like to do but you're not sure if you'll be able to: I really want to avoid exposing LO to TV/tablets/etc. of any kind before she starts preschool, mostly because I had a terrible time paying attention all the way through grad school and want to do anything possible to help tip the scales to avoid it for her. OTOH, I already have a "B" plan, which is to find recordings of Great Performances at the Met and American Ballet Theater, etc. which I hope will at least give her an appreciation of the arts w/o exposing her to anything all that exciting.
1) Cloth diapering, we already have a good amount of them and luckily my DH's mom did it with all 5 of her kids so she's a great support (even if she does get confused with the new stuff)
2) Breast feed for as long as I can manage. Hopefully I make it a year.
Am I the only FTM that doesn't care about cosleeping? Like, it's kind of annoying but my bed is already full of pets so I guess a kid doesn't weird me out. I just don't feel that strongly either way.
No co-sleeping before 1. I was a super freak about SIDS and never even napped with DS until he was over a year. H fell asleep on the couch with him once and whn I discovered it, all hell broke loose because he's the heaviest sleeper ever. It didn't ever happen again.
2) One thing you said you'd never do, and did within about 3 days (or 3 months):
Formula feeding. I was 100% about breastfeeding, until DS was born...then I wasn't interested at all. He got formula in the hospital. I have no regrets.
**I was totally one of "those" moms before I actually had a child. FTMs- life happens, shit happens, don't set yourself up for disappointment and failure by coming up with 100 things you're not going to do**
I didnt want to to it because I assumed it was unsafe and didn't want to start bad habits etc. Then I had a colicky baby with reflux and realized I needed to sleep somehow
I also think it's a bad idea to sleep with a really small baby actually in the bed with you. We have a bassinet that we are keeping in the room until he outgrows it (seems like a common thing to do).