How about you offer a trade? Hubby will go help aunt with handyman-type stuff that she can't do, and you give her your grocery list and dry cleaning. I think it would be fair for him to say that he has a full plate but if they can take something off of his/your plate, then you can help them. They'll probably say no thanks...
I feel your pain OP!! My DH is similar. He is the type who feels the need to 'fix' everything around him & he spreads himself too thin as result, he's also the only boy of the 3 siblings on his side so he has parents & 2 sisters that constantly 'need' something... & both sisters are married!! I finally put my foot down month 7 of this pregnancy & told that him that while I admire how giving a person he is.. his best quality is sometimes his worst. That it isn't his duty to fix everyone else's problems, that his sisters have husbands who had fix things around their homes/care for their children & that his parents while of course a priority- now need to come in #2 bc his new #1 is HIS wife & HIS baby. I told him very honestly that I didn't feel like I was a priority & it hurt me. He took it very well & has been great since. I even overheard him telling one of his sister's "no" when being asked to care for her toddler on a day he had plans to do nursery stuff with me. He politely but firmly said "I'm sorry but I'm getting some work done for my baby today" I almost cried from joy!!! ha ha Anyway, I'm not posting to gush, my point is maybe having an honest convo about how his behavior makes you feel will help him redirect his efforts? My DH had told me at the time that bc I wasn't saying anything he didn't think I cared & that my 'pissiness' was just a regular pregnancy thing... NOW he knows better!!!
Unless there's information you're not sharing, OP (nice DD, BTW), I don't see what the problem is. Just because you're 9 months pregnant doesn't mean the rest of the world stops existing. Is he driving 8 hours to help his aunt? Is he not doing things around your house because he's too busy helping other people?
I'm not sure what it means to you to be "fully prepared", because in my experience as a mom of two, that's pretty much an impossible state. But as long as you have a car seat, you're going to be fine.
bstrine19
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