January 2015 Moms

2nd FB group discussion

2

Re: 2nd FB group discussion

  • YaMrWhite said:
    I wonder if we should post something on the fb group now about cleaning out members who joined but never do anything and about after baby comes. It might bring the two concepts together. New moderator because old one couldn't do here and there:) I like both sites and like pp , like it is secret .
    Not really to me.. because one of the reasons I left was because I didn't know half of them, so that wouldn't really do much to me but weed out some.  It was like "my sister is due in january, can she join?" type of thing that just wasn't for me.  Not everyone is from here.  I'd rather be in a smaller group of ladies that just post here :)
    That was my issue too. I gave it another shot but am slowly inching closer to the leave group button again :/
    Hey, not every group is for every person :)  I tried for awhile, wasn't for me. No harm. I'm glad lots of people love and enjoy it!  I'm just more into smaller groups with regulars, or simply adding girls here I'm closer to as friends without a group.
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    (Zoe Claire- born at 33.6 weeks- November 19, '14 - 5lbs 15oz)
  • I'll be interested in watching to see what happens with a post-baby FB group. I do find the current one super busy which can sometimes clog up my newsfeed, but I actually like that I can post something super random there that I wouldn't start a whole thread to post here.

    I like the idea of a smaller group, though, so like I said, I'm interested in seeing what happens. Though I have to say, even though it's a fairly large group, I haven't seen any major drama, so that's nice.
    Any time I join a FB group (I'm in QUITE a few between the two children/pregnancies, haha) - I turn off the notifications from my newsfeed. Then I don't see any of it unless I click on that group page. It used to drive me nuts to have it in my feed!
    As long as I've been on FB, I've never been able to figure out how to do this. School me, @icarriedawatermelon !
    So if you go to a group page, over on the right (sort of floating in the banner) there are a few tabs ("joined," "add people," "notifications", etc). Click on notifications and select "off." Done! :)
    No, I've done this a million times. It doesn't work for me. Waaah! :(
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  • @LadyXaverian Notifications are different from newsfeed. Go to something in the newsfeed, click the right top arrow, and choose "unfollow" - that will keep all of it from showing up there. The notifications change is only the globe with red numbers.
    I feel like I've tried this, too, but I will try again. Thank you. :)

    I actually left the Car Seats for the Littles FB group for this reason-- I couldn't make the posts in my newsfeed go away.
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  • I'm in the current FB group and the ladies all seem nice but I don't post as much there because I don't understand who they are on TB, so I don't feel like I know them. I'd be totally up to join a FB group after babies are born that is smaller and with people who are active posters here.
  • YaMrWhite said:
    I wonder if we should post something on the fb group now about cleaning out members who joined but never do anything and about after baby comes. It might bring the two concepts together. New moderator because old one couldn't do here and there:) I like both sites and like pp , like it is secret .
    Not really to me.. because one of the reasons I left was because I didn't know half of them, so that wouldn't really do much to me but weed out some.  It was like "my sister is due in january, can she join?" type of thing that just wasn't for me.  Not everyone is from here.  I'd rather be in a smaller group of ladies that just post here :)
    That was my issue too. I gave it another shot but am slowly inching closer to the leave group button again :/
    Hey, not every group is for every person :)  I tried for awhile, wasn't for me. No harm. I'm glad lots of people love and enjoy it!  I'm just more into smaller groups with regulars, or simply adding girls here I'm closer to as friends without a group.

    Yeah maybe two different groups will be better then;) leave the one that is there and is established, and you guys start your own where you know one another!
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  • I chose not to join the FB group because it was closing right after I got here and I didn't super comfortable joining at that time. I would be open to joining a second group after the LOs arrive.

    Also-- I heard that they are going to start charging $2.99/month for FB accounts. I have no idea if this is actually true? I hope it's just a rumor because it's a freaking terrible idea and there's no way I'm paying for FB!

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  • I chose not to join the FB group because it was closing right after I got here and I didn't super comfortable joining at that time. I would be open to joining a second group after the LOs arrive. Also-- I heard that they are going to start charging $2.99/month for FB accounts. I have no idea if this is actually true? I hope it's just a rumor because it's a freaking terrible idea and there's no way I'm paying for FB!
    Every once in a while some kind of paid FB rumor starts - I don't think it will ever be true. But who knows.
  • I'd be in for a smaller FB group! Not sure how the 'rules' and posting would work...but I would work to meet the quota:)

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  • I'd be in for a smaller FB group! Not sure how the 'rules' and posting would work...but I would work to meet the quota:)
    I think it's easier to set that kind of thing up with a smaller group. My personal feeling is that if you haven't taken the time to check in or say hi in six or more months, chances are you won't again, but it's much easier to figure out who those people are in a small group.
  • I left the fb group. Too many people, and I felt hardly any of them even posted here anymore.
    I prefer TB anyway.

    I even left my other bmb fb group, because seriously like only a handful were even still active On TB, everyone else didn't like TB anymore.
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  • I am definitely up for this!! I joined here a little late in the game and just recently became more active. I use my phone alot of the time, and just thought the facebook idea worked better for me. Please, let me know if this becomes a thing, I'm all over it!!!
  • So I have a question. There has been a lot of talk about this second group being for more "active" members. How do we determine this? Who determines this? Do we determine it by post count for our BMB, or in total on the bump? Do we have one of the more frequent posters (like @LadyXaverian‌ @ladyamanuet‌ @ExcitedMama2‌ ect) start the grouo and then weed through all the requests from the bump and select who gets to join? Or do we just let anyone from our BMB join, then weed them out as we go? Honestly there are some that have commented on this thread that I barely recognize the name, and I consider myself to be an active participant here. I'm not opposed to either of the options. I like the idea of setting up something in order to be able to weed out members.

    My S13 group has 106 members. There are several that never post, comment, or like anything. But we never set up a weeding out method. So there really isn't a way to get rid of them.

    And FTR I'll join the second group. I probably won't post a ton of pics of LO on the bump. Or I'll post then delete them. But I'll share pics over a fb group frequently. Also I didn't join the first group because it was kind of a free for all. Friends of members were allowed to join. I remember someone saying that they thought it was dumb to make it exclusive to people in the bump BMB but its a group that started from the bump, and I'd like a way to connect rea names/faces to TB usernames. So that's why I didn't join.

    I agree. " my sisters best friends cousin is pregnant and due in January, can she be added?"

    Uhh.... NO!

    Actually. ...I think several people said yes.

    That drove me crazy!

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  • So I have a question. There has been a lot of talk about this second group being for more "active" members. How do we determine this? Who determines this? Do we determine it by post count for our BMB, or in total on the bump? Do we have one of the more frequent posters (like @LadyXaverian‌ @ladyamanuet‌ @ExcitedMama2‌ ect) start the grouo and then weed through all the requests from the bump and select who gets to join? Or do we just let anyone from our BMB join, then weed them out as we go? Honestly there are some that have commented on this thread that I barely recognize the name, and I consider myself to be an active participant here. I'm not opposed to either of the options. I like the idea of setting up something in order to be able to weed out members. My S13 group has 106 members. There are several that never post, comment, or like anything. But we never set up a weeding out method. So there really isn't a way to get rid of them. And FTR I'll join the second group. I probably won't post a ton of pics of LO on the bump. Or I'll post then delete them. But I'll share pics over a fb group frequently. Also I didn't join the first group because it was kind of a free for all. Friends of members were allowed to join. I remember someone saying that they thought it was dumb to make it exclusive to people in the bump BMB but its a group that started from the bump, and I'd like a way to connect rea names/faces to TB usernames. So that's why I didn't join.
    That's a good point- maybe looking at their post history after requesting to join? Just to make sure they've said more than "I want to join." I don't know how detailed we want to get, like you have to have X comments in the last 2 months or if we just look and say, yes they have a post history. 
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  • vjdk07 said:
    So I have a question. There has been a lot of talk about this second group being for more "active" members. How do we determine this? Who determines this? Do we determine it by post count for our BMB, or in total on the bump? Do we have one of the more frequent posters (like @LadyXaverian‌ @ladyamanuet‌ @ExcitedMama2‌ ect) start the grouo and then weed through all the requests from the bump and select who gets to join? Or do we just let anyone from our BMB join, then weed them out as we go? Honestly there are some that have commented on this thread that I barely recognize the name, and I consider myself to be an active participant here. I'm not opposed to either of the options. I like the idea of setting up something in order to be able to weed out members. My S13 group has 106 members. There are several that never post, comment, or like anything. But we never set up a weeding out method. So there really isn't a way to get rid of them. And FTR I'll join the second group. I probably won't post a ton of pics of LO on the bump. Or I'll post then delete them. But I'll share pics over a fb group frequently. Also I didn't join the first group because it was kind of a free for all. Friends of members were allowed to join. I remember someone saying that they thought it was dumb to make it exclusive to people in the bump BMB but its a group that started from the bump, and I'd like a way to connect rea names/faces to TB usernames. So that's why I didn't join.
    I agree. " my sisters best friends cousin is pregnant and due in January, can she be added?" Uhh.... NO! Actually. ...I think several people said yes. That drove me crazy!
    ------------------------- I guess I don't see the difference in this and every random person on TB that was able to join when it was open. In the end, no one really knows anyone here or there.
    But I like to think the regulars here kinda "know" each other more?
    We do now.  Just as I've gotten to know a few women who were added on the FB group but weren't bumpies because a few of them became regulars over there.

    I think starting a group WHILE we're still pregnant, we would have to be open to members like that because they could very easily have been bumpies (or could just come join TB just to make the FB jump).  AFTER babies have been born, I don't think it's appropriate.  Idk I just don't.  There are probably some reasons in there that makes sense, but probably some reasons that anyone who disagrees would point out could be argued as supporting why the opposite is true.

    Ultimately, go where you're comfortable.  I hope to never alienate anyone, but I also totally understand the want to keep groups small(er) for reasons such as safety and familiarity.
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  • @ExcitedMama2‌ I was calling you out AS a frequent poster :)
  • @MusicFanatic and @LadyAmanuet - Thanks. I am so horribly, painfully shy. I want to be considered a reg, but it's really hard to tell if I'm active enough. :)
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  • @aerotigergirl‌ I'd definitely say you are a reg. I always remember your name without even having to think twice.
  • @BookitBoo-- pretty sure you're a reg.  hahaha.
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  • BookitBoo said:
     ETA: am i a reg or a rando? LMK!
    I hope you're joking, yo! :P
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    (Zoe Claire- born at 33.6 weeks- November 19, '14 - 5lbs 15oz)
  • @irishgrover‌

    Good question! How many active posters do we have on our BMB right now? Is there any way to find out?
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  • vjdk07 said:
    So I have a question. There has been a lot of talk about this second group being for more "active" members. How do we determine this? Who determines this? Do we determine it by post count for our BMB, or in total on the bump? Do we have one of the more frequent posters (like @LadyXaverian‌ @ladyamanuet‌ @ExcitedMama2‌ ect) start the grouo and then weed through all the requests from the bump and select who gets to join? Or do we just let anyone from our BMB join, then weed them out as we go? Honestly there are some that have commented on this thread that I barely recognize the name, and I consider myself to be an active participant here. I'm not opposed to either of the options. I like the idea of setting up something in order to be able to weed out members. My S13 group has 106 members. There are several that never post, comment, or like anything. But we never set up a weeding out method. So there really isn't a way to get rid of them. And FTR I'll join the second group. I probably won't post a ton of pics of LO on the bump. Or I'll post then delete them. But I'll share pics over a fb group frequently. Also I didn't join the first group because it was kind of a free for all. Friends of members were allowed to join. I remember someone saying that they thought it was dumb to make it exclusive to people in the bump BMB but its a group that started from the bump, and I'd like a way to connect rea names/faces to TB usernames. So that's why I didn't join.
    I agree. " my sisters best friends cousin is pregnant and due in January, can she be added?" Uhh.... NO! Actually. ...I think several people said yes. That drove me crazy!
    ------------------------- I guess I don't see the difference in this and every random person on TB that was able to join when it was open. In the end, no one really knows anyone here or there.
    But I like to think the regulars here kinda "know" each other more?
    Right! And, you know.... personal info like first and last names over on fb. Not that I didn't know that before I joined though. I just joined too soon over there, before I "got to know" people. It's supposed to be a closed secret group, so adding people who are friends of friends just because they were due at the same time defeats the purpose of it being a 'closed secret group. ' it was made for bumpies from this bmb. If they want to get involved and be a part of a community, just join TB.
    The personal info thing is the reason I didn't join the FB group - I know that no one could see my wall and whatnot if I have my settings set correctly on FB but I would be giving away my full name which is distinctive enough to be searchable.  I would only want to be in a FB group with people that I "know" - I would be inclined to join a 2nd FB group after babies are born.
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  • I prefer it over here because I feel like I know people better? I would be open to a small FB group once the babies are born though. I'm a member of the first one, but it is rather big and I feel like things get lost. I think by the time the babies come we will have a general feel of who the regulars are.
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  • saiven said:

    papapalie said:

    I joined late and I didnt know the etiquette of a BMB. My sister got super close to the people in her group when she was pregnant and I wanted to feel the same thing. I hope I dont get excluded from the group either, I too am like PP and was picked last or made fun of in school. I love the idea of joining a facebook group so I have people to talk to and ask questions about baby and mommy things. I think all of you ladies are amazing and such a great help.  

    I know you.

    I think it's more of a metric to determine who is "legit" rather than who all like enough to let in. If people recognize you and you're a relatively frequent poster (I know I can be an over-poster) then you should make your way in. I think it may be the kind of thing we don't do a BMB wide call out for? Thoughts?
    -----------------

    I think it all starts with a central group of 20 or so frequent posters and once we get those together, it's not about popularity but at least be recognizable. You don't have to post here everyday to have your screenname be recognizable.. just someone to say "I remember her!"... it just helps stop every "Pete Harry Sam" from getting in the group. That will help keep numbers down.
  • I'm in the current Facebook group. It's pretty huge but I like getting to know the gals over here and there. I post on TB and FB. I prefer posting photos on the FB page because it's a closed group. It feels a little more private for that reason.

     

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  • I think it was discussed that after babies were born we would wait a month or two and see who stuck around. From those posters possibly create a FB group.


    My last BMB did terrible on FB. They were very catty and I eventually left the group (sorry if there are any sept11 ladies on here, it was just too much drama for me).

    I am hoping by waiting that won't be the case with this group!
    I'm a Sept. 2011 mama too! I think they eventually "dropped me" because I didn't post enough.
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  • My last BMB started a FB group after the babies were born and it pretty much killed our Bump BMB. I don't know if I'd join another FB group or not. I like the format here though, so I'll probably stick around. When the babies are six months old you can all come check on me and the tumbleweeds. :)
    This is what happened to me too. I was in April 2012 and as soon as the FB group got made it killed the board. Also, the talk of Regs vs Randos provokes total irrational anxiety about being popular enough for the group in me. 
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