feeling like this wont ever happen..

runner76

I know this is probably crazy but I am feeling really pessimistic about getting PG.. We took a chance in August.. ( 2 days before ovulation) and last month actually tried.. ( 2 days before Ov and again on OV day and day after)  nothing. I know its only couple months but we are 38 and idk.. dr wasn't sure last year if I could possibly have fibroids.. I was supposed to have a MRI but couldn't afford the deductible.. im hoping its not.. it was a transvaginal he did cause I have clots  when I ovulate. I mean it does on average take 6 months right?? Also, do you think its worthwhile to get ovulation test??

Davie813

I know it's discouraging--hang in there!

It's a good idea for anyone TTC, but especially those of us who don't have unlimited time, to get a general workup in the beginning--CD 3 bloodwork, HSG if possible, and yes, 7 dpo progesterone test.  That will give you an idea of what you're working with, whether there's anything that needs further investigation, and whether you need to move to more aggressive measures in the near future.

OBs are extremely unpopular on this board, but if fertility coverage is an issue, they can often code some of this stuff so insurance will cover it (mine did, long ago when I was TTC my DD).

Good luck!

kelley72

I'm sorry you feel discouraged, I believe that is normal and when we focus on hearing the ticktock in the background then even more so.  I don't find having baseline bloodwork testing all that invasive, but as pp stated there are costs associated with it even when performed by an ob.  Ob's also are not who I would turn to for interpretation of the labwork once performed.  Two cycles ttc is nothing in the grand scheme of things even for a 38 yr old.  6months ttc PRIOR to seeking an RE for over 35's is normal time frame, not 6 months of ttc = pregnancy.

Best wishes

runner76

so you think try for 6 months.. then see RE if nothing? You think its worthwhile to buy a OV test .. DH was going to buy the at home sperm test but I don't want to waste money if its not real

Davie813

runner76 said:

so you think try for 6 months.. then see RE if nothing? You think its worthwhile to buy a OV test .. DH was going to buy the at home sperm test but I don't want to waste money if its not real

Do you mean an opk (Ovulation Prediction Kit)?  It certainly can't hurt.  Are you charting?  If not, (especially since you don't seem to be using opks, either) I'm not sure how you know exactly when you ovulate.  You might as well at least make sure your timing is right!

The over the counter sperm tests are "real."  They accurately measure sperm count.  They don't say anything about the health of the sperm, however.  DH did take one, and it gave us some peace of mind, but since they don't give a complete picture, it may or may not be worth it to you.

Depending on your insurance, you may need 6 months of documented trying, and a referral from your OB, to see an RE (I did).

wannabmama23

Sorry you're feeling frustrated. I can definitely commiserate. We have only been trying for 3 cycles (and only 2 temping so we actually knew what was going on) and I'm already worried. I keep telling myself not to worry--but if course that's like ignoring the proverbial elephant in the room.

I don't have much advice except to relay what my doc said when I told her we were going to try...she said, "have all the sex you can for six months, if nothing happens, come see me." So...we are taking her advice for now.

Thanks to pp's with info on RE/OB and insurance issues, that's something I know nothing about and want to learn as much as possible before that six month mark...just in case I need it!

Eta: doc didn't suggest there was a "problem" if nothing happened by 6mo, just said that's a good time to start testing for those if us with ticking clocks...

runner76

how old are you wanna?   we are both 38. hope by then It isn't too late. I was lucky in my first marriage and got PG on first try.. that was 9 years ago though

wannabmama23

I'm 36, DH is a young'un at only 31, but my understanding was that the "normal course" was based on me being over 35. And, I've seen lots of people here and elsewhere get PG at and over 38, so there's definitely still hope!

flyliceandcoffee

I don't have much to add except some words of hope. I have A LOT of pregnant friends right now and a good portion of them are in their late 30s. They give me hope that we can get pregnant again, and just knowing other ladies are making attempts and being successful at it is a thought I hold near and dear. Yes it might take a bit (we can't always get what we want right when we want it), but it's definitely possible!

kelley72

I had a baby at 41 so to me 38 is prime time!  The best course of action for ANY age is to chart your temp, cp/cf, use opk's if you like and bed eod during your fertile week.  As pp stated if you're having sex all the time except your fertile days you'll very unlikely to conceive.  Charting is the best way to ensure you are hitting your fertile window.  I'm pretty sure, without going and reading old posts, you've commented here before, and suggestions for getting on fertility friend, and Taking Charge of Your Fertility (book) were given.  Best wishes!  

runner76

yes, I got the book and am getting a OPK. question,, we actually are very active and have sex almost daily.. up until the last couple months we would stop during my OV window. like 5 days before OV and I would make him stop two days after ov.. but now that we are trying I am wondering.. is too much sex not good for sperm count?? Should we try every day week before OV and try to not as much on unfertile days..

kelley72

With unknown sperm issues have sex as often as you like, although I believe eod is sufficient.