Husband Deploying Before Birth

lczta

There is a very real possibility my husband will miss the birth of our first child. So I have very specific questions about leading up to labor. Our family (either mothers) may not be able to come and stay prior to the baby being born.

• Who did you have drive you to the hospital? We live in a very wide spread base and are outsourced to other doctors off base because base doesn't have services (we live off base as well and about a half hour from the hospital).
• What did you do in the event of a Medical POA in the absence of your husband?
• Is there anything else I should know about giving birth alone? We are looking into a doula as well.

Any and all advice is greatly appreciated.

iluvmytxrgr

- there are doulas who will provide their services for free if your spouse is deployed.

- contact your FRG. Many have people who volunteer to drive you to the hospital or provide meals and such.

NSL

-I made arrangements with a couple of friends who lived near enough to drive me to the hospital before my parents arrived to help. -I had an advance directive, but didn't get a separate medical POA. -A doula is a good idea, as is contacting the FRG to see what they can offer by way of help.

lczta

I wish we had an FRG, we're air force so we don't have anything like that. We have a small spouses group for the squadron but everyone living upwards of an hour away I can't rely on them to provide anything

divinemsbee

Does the squadron have a Key Spouse? Or can you contact the Airman Family Readiness people? I see that you're a little father away, but this is the kind of thing that they're great for finding resources to help. AFR would also be the place to go for finding info on doulas and medical directives. For me, I would definitely have a doula if no one else was available.

As far as getting to the hospital, if there's no one that can take you, and it comes to this, can you look into getting a hotel room at the base hotel around your EDD? I know that's not a perfect plan because you never know when baby will come, but if you're completely isolated my other suggestion is a cab or car service?

hlm184

Get a doula.  Even if you can't get a free one, pay for one.  She will be worth every penny.

Getting to the hospital... if you can't find someone, keep the cab company in your phone.

shesamommy

I delivered while my DH was deployed. Fleet and Family has New Parent Support and a home visiting nurse. They came to the hospital and stayed with me until my mom and inlaws showed up. I felt comfortable with them by the time i delivered because i met with them regularly to just talk or to make sure i had help with last minute things.