Poll - marriage and kids

freeatlast2014

Do you want to get married?

Do you want more children?

One of the previous posts got me thinking...

freeatlast2014

I want to get married again because I am a hopeless romantic. And I believe forever is possible. And I want forever.

I do not want more children. I can be persuaded if the man I loved had no bio children of his own, but if he was ok with that or had his own children, I would not want to add more kids. I'm in the weeds with 2 20 months apart as it is!!!

MinnesotaMomma91

I want to get remarried, but thats becauase i have my awesomley awesome bf.

And we plan on having more kids.

jellybean529

I would like to remarry. I am 99.9% sure I'm done having kids, though...I had a high risk pregnancy and PPD/PPA that I never fully recovered from. If my potential mate considered this a deal breaker I'd be open to discussion but I feel complete as a mom to one...especially since she's been out of diapers for four years now!

20thirteen

I never fantasized about marriage or children.  Actually, until I was pregnant, I convinced myself I'd never marry and that I would look into what it would take for a hysterectomy. And I had been with BD for 4 years at that point.

With BF, though, sometimes I catch myself wondering what it would be like to sign my name differently (with his last name instead of mine), but that has been the extent of any kind of marriage fantasy.  Which is more than anything I've ever imagined with anyone else, so it does say *something*.

As for more children, now that I have this one, yeah, I catch myself thinking about babies more and how I want to have siblings for DD.  I come from a family with 4 kids who are close in age, BF was a single child.  I'm actually struggling with baby fever more than usual, and I might have to talk to BF about it.  I was good at keeping it a secret but a bunch of my friends are pregnant now and I'm finding it harder to hide my jealousy. Haha.

MinnesotaMomma91

20thirteen said:

I never fantasized about marriage or children.  Actually, until I was pregnant, I convinced myself I'd never marry and that I would look into what it would take for a hysterectomy. And I had been with BD for 4 years at that point.

With BF, though, sometimes I catch myself wondering what it would be like to sign my name differently (with his last name instead of mine), but that has been the extent of any kind of marriage fantasy.  Which is more than anything I've ever imagined with anyone else, so it does say *something*.

As for more children, now that I have this one, yeah, I catch myself thinking about babies more and how I want to have siblings for DD.  I come from a family with 4 kids who are close in age, BF was a single child.  I'm actually struggling with baby fever more than usual, and I might have to talk to BF about it.  I was good at keeping it a secret but a bunch of my friends are pregnant now and I'm finding it harder to hide my jealousy. Haha.

Everyone i know is pregnant or havong baboes and my baby fever is at all time high right now. But bf has to keep remending me why we havent started trying yet.

We havent because of me being in school and we already have a two(almost 3) year old and a one year old between the two of us and we want to het one of them out of diapers before we have another

tig594

Hell no and I can't have more kids, so even though I'd probably do it again, it's impossible so no point in thinking about it.  I'd consider fostering to adopt a small child but I'll be too old for the adoption part in a few years.  Right now it's impossible financially and I don't have time to give 2 kids.  I'm also enjoying DD way to much.

ShyLittleViolet

I believe in marriage, and felt like I was a good wife. I want to get remarried one day. Hopefully, I'll be able to have at least one more baby. I'm 34, so I do have a few years left. I just worry because my first pregnancy was a bit difficult.

starrdiva211

I am kind of torn about the marriage thing. I am starting to think, maybe I am not cut out for the long term thing. I say this b/c a guy I am talking to (the alumni of the tech college I work at), mentioned how long he had been chasing me and things could be different now if two and a half years ago, I would have taken that chance... and he elaborated and I went into panic mode!  LOL I might be commitment phobe.

It has been medically recommended that I dont have another one but she said if I did, be prepared for specialist visit out of this world and bedrest as soon as I hit my 5th, 6th month. If it comes down to it and the person I was with wanted one, we would have to have the longest heart to heart ever!!!! But as of right now, I am cool with The Lil Emperor. Also, the complications of my 6th and 7th month still haunt me.

20thirteen

MinnesotaMomma91 said:

Everyone i know is pregnant or havong baboes and my baby fever is at all time high right now. But bf has to keep remending me why we havent started trying yet. We havent because of me being in school and we already have a two(almost 3) year old and a one year old between the two of us and we want to het one of them out of diapers before we have another

I forgot to tell you!  I had bought a potty for DD and put it in the bathroom, figured I'd let her get used to knowing it was in there.  The next day, BF came over and when he went into the bathroom and saw it, he stopped and turned to me "It's not time yet, right? For that? Please say it isn't..." It was the sweetest thing ever the way he panicked.

MinnesotaMomma91

20thirteen said:

MinnesotaMomma91 said:

Everyone i know is pregnant or havong baboes and my baby fever is at all time high right now. But bf has to keep remending me why we havent started trying yet.

We havent because of me being in school and we already have a two(almost 3) year old and a one year old between the two of us and we want to het one of them out of diapers before we have another

I forgot to tell you!  I had bought a potty for DD and put it in the bathroom, figured I'd let her get used to knowing it was in there.  The next day, BF came over and when he went into the bathroom and saw it, he stopped and turned to me "It's not time yet, right? For that? Please say it isn't..." It was the sweetest thing ever the way he panicked.

Bf and c are locked in a battle of will over the potty. Bf is trying to potty train but c doesnt want to. So he tells bf after he goes.

Bf got all panicked when ds started climbing stairs because "ive missed him being a baby, my baby boy isnt a baby anymore!" Ive got the baby fever bad and i want a girl. Which is made worse by my adorable niece

LongIslandMama1114

I'm a hopeless romantic so I'd love to get married again someday (I wasn't married to BD...I got married in 2005 and divorced shortly after). However, I wonder if I'll ever make the right choice in a man because my track record hasn't shown otherwise.

I'm 35 and 28 weeks pregnant. I'd LOVE to have another one but not sure how it would work out. I mean, before BD and I started dating, I swore I was going to a sperm bank at 35 so I guess that's an option. I won't really know until this LO is born. If I hit 40 and still don't have another, it's probably not in the stars for me.

20thirteen

@minnesotamomma91  I wanted a boy so badly, and seeing all the little boys at daycare do not make it any better.  However, I would never change anything with what I have, I love DD but I have to admit that I cried when I found out I was having a girl.  I had so many boy things in my brain.

MinnesotaMomma91

@20Thirteen, i was that way with wanting a girl. I really hope i get a girl next time around but id still be happy with another boy

jellybean529

@20thirteen This is probably a FFFC but...I wasn't going to find out the sex of the baby when I was pregnant with A. Then at my anatomy scan they asked and I caved it. I had a gut feeling from the moment I found out I was pregnant that I was having a girl, but I wanted a boy. I had already bought boy clothes and a blue photo album...and the tech said "Looks like a girl!" Her dad was THRILLED (he's the oldest of 4 with three sisters, so he knew all about baby girls). He had to go back to work after the appointment and I got in the car kind of feeling like I was in shock...and when I turned on the radio "Girls just wanna have fun" was on and I couldn't stop smiling.

Now I can't imagine DD being a boy and if I ever had another (not bloody likely...lol) I think I'd want another little girl. Amazing how things change

20thirteen

@minnesotamomma91 - Next time, I'm hoping for a boy.  But at the same time, I'm having so much fun with DD that I wouldn't mind another girl either.  When BF and I talked about kids last year, he told me he had wanted a girl, but since we had H, he would now like a boy. LOL

@jellybean529 - I was SO MAD at the u/s tech when I went in for the anatomy scan.  When she was moving the wand around my belly, she said "wow, he's really moving around in there.  Would you like to know the sex of your baby?" And I thought "well, you pretty much just confirmed it..." and said "yes, please!" and the tech said "it's a GIRL!"  I wanted to punch her.  Up until that point, DD's nickname was "Bats" because I knew I was having a boy and he was going to be named Bruce Wayne. For serious.  Because the name Bruce runs in one side of the family and Wayne runs in the other.

MinnesotaMomma91

B was going to be troian lee because im obsessed with the name amd i know bf wont let me use ot on a future daughter and lee is my moms middle name.
I still want a girl but if we have one bf amd i will be duking it over names.

tig594

I always knew I'd have a girl if I ever had a child.  It's just always been there.  I never wanted boys until I started hanging around my aunt's little foster kids.  Then when I got pregnant with DD I kind of did want a boy.  My OB called it early on, though, when she was listening to DD's heartbeat in her office around 10 weeks.  She said the heartbeat was fast and that she'd bet I was carrying a girl.  Regardless, I also couldn't be happier with the child I have.   :x

eg214

I would like to get married again but unfortunately I am just not sure I buy it. I hate to be that way but because I hate when people are such downers about marriage but I just don't know.

Kids? Meh. I am perfectly happy not having anymore, but if I did in fact find an amazing guy and get married and he wanted one more...maybe. I am just not a fan of big age gaps between kids...because of what i experienced this summer.

eg214

Excited30 said:

I want to be married, I want more kids.  I don't want to do parenting alone.  

You'll find your forever. I don't remember your circumstances, but although it's not what you thought or hoped, you will find someone to love you and your little(s). I don't think anyone wants to parent alone or get divorced, but it is what it is.