Bedtime is torture lately. Anyone else? Is this a 2YO thing?

MomtobeNJ

Is there a 2 year old sleep regression? Or could I be dealing with separation anxiety? Or her molars coming in? DD is generally a really great sleeper. We moved to a new house 3 weeks ago and there has been a lot of change - new house, neighborhood, daycare, etc. But she seemed to be adjusting really well. For the past week, bedtime has been torture. She screams bloody murder for 30-60 minutes. I go in several times to cuddle, walk, rub her back, etc. She's totally calm when I'm in there, and then she freaks out about 5 minutes after I leave her room. 

Maybe it's separation anxiety?? But she was fine the first 2 weeks we were here. Tonight I even gave her Motrin before her bath as a preemptive measure because she was chewed on her blanket a lot. She was still up and crying for almost an hour before she passed out. She's breaking my heart. Any ideas? I guess it could also just be one of those random toddler phases. She's napping fine at daycare and at home on the weekends.

I hate when she's inconsolable like that - it literally makes me want to jump out of my skin. I've been MIA here for a couple of weeks because we're still trying to get settled in the new house, I start a new job on Sept. 2 and my current job is being total total dicks, and my husband has a job interview this Thursday so I've been helping him prep for that because his current job is absolute disaster. I'm on my last, very thin, quickly fraying nerve.  

:-<

AKB090609

DD also had a week of the same behavior a few weeks ago, it seemed to be worse for her if we went in to comfort her. It lasted 4-5 nights and then she went back to her normal happy self.

I hope it passes quickly for you as well!

MomtobeNJ

She might. Maybe if it happens again tomorrow I'll try rubbing her back for a minute and then just standing there and see if that helps. I just thought it was odd that she was fine for the first 2 weeks. We moved in exactly 3 weeks ago today. But maybe it's just the enormity of all the change catching up to her, you know? Even though she's happy, it's a lot to process. She loves her new daycare, so that's a plus. I know I just have to wait it out. 

miss50

maybe your new house has a residual resident?  hopefully kidding.

sleep has been horrible here for the last week.  i believe she is having some sort of night terror because it is instant screaming.  she wakes me out of a dead sleep.

i've had really good luck just rocking her back to sleep, but last night that constituted over an hour in the rocking chair. 

with all the changes, i really have no good advise.  good luck and hopefully it will pass. 

Bighair12

We are in a similar struggle.  I have been more busy than usual lately.  She has been waking up at night and will not go back down unless she is with me.  Like two to three hours of solid crying with random middle of the night poops on top of it.  When I do bring her to bed she has to be touching me.  Like my face on hers or my arm on her.  It is making me crazy.

She used to sleep just fine.  I don't study when she is awake but I have been working more lately.  We are at our wits end.

jenmbott

DD has been going through this too.  She pats her pillow because she is trying to tell me (doesn't have the speech) that she wants me to lay there with her.  Some nights she cries for quite a while.  Other nights I have to do a recap of what happened that day and what we are going to do the following day.  Then I have to tell her in a firm voice that there is no need to cry because she has x, y and z that she always has when she goes to bed (blankie, glow worm and water).  Sometimes it works, but sometimes it doesn't.

I read somewhere that there is a sleep regression at 2 years old.  I hope this is it.  Otherwise it's a parenting fail of not keeping her on a strict enough schedule during the summer, or her needing less total hours of sleep.  Sometimes parenting is a total crapshoot. 

Flamingemu

It has been about a month so far of L not going to sleep though she is clearly tired. She screams for me, then DH, then whateverdamn stuffed animal is not in her crib that particular night. 

We are lucky that she is generally receptive to lay down, close your eyes, mommy is not coming in here again until the sun comes up. AND you have to stay in your crib all night and not climb out. ha

MomtobeNJ

Thankfully she still has never attempted to climb out. Knock on ALL THE WOOD. Watch, now I just jinxed myself.

It's probably just going to be a crappy few weeks, because I think it's a little of everything. DH gets her up and takes her to daycare in the morning, and this morning he gave her some Motrin because he said she was chewing on everything - her blanket, spoon, cup spout. And when he asked her if there was an "ouch" in her mouth, she said yes. DAMN TEETH!!!!!!!!!!!!

smb+jab

We are have similar problems and within the last few weeks.  DS use to be a good sleeper and we didn't have any problems with him going down for the night.

Then DH left for a two week business trip.  I thought he was just having some issues b/c daddy wasn't home and was pushing bedtime etc.  However we are still having the same problems he wants to stay up and watch elmo or thomas until almost 9 or I have to read 20 books!  He just doesn't want to go to to bed (his bedtime was 730/800).  So maybe its an age thing.  He is also in the process of getting his molars and has been biting his blanket and sticking his fingers in this mouth.

I was also going to ask if anyone has started to move their S12er to a toddler bed?  DS can climb out of the crib and I don't want to move him to the toddler bed (it would mean a lot of changes for child proofing) but i am afraid of him hurting himself if he climbs out at bedtime. he is normally ok in the mornings.  Its the  reason i have to stay with for a hour or so until he falls asleep instead of what we use to let him do was cry for a few minutes and they he would calm himself down and realize it was time for bed and go to sleep.

melody921

DD has been sobbing almost every night (last night was the first time she hasn't in almost 2 weeks!). She's always been a good sleeper, so it really freaked me out at first. I took her back out of her crib, rocked her, sang a song, read another book, talked to her a little. But no matter what I did, she clung to me and screamed when I put her back in the crib. As heartbreaking as it was, I had to just leave her there and go tend DS. I found that she settled down within a couple of minutes once I was gone.

Flamingemu

smb+jab said:

We are have similar problems and within the last few weeks.  DS use to be a good sleeper and we didn't have any problems with him going down for the night.

Then DH left for a two week business trip.  I thought he was just having some issues b/c daddy wasn't home and was pushing bedtime etc.  However we are still having the same problems he wants to stay up and watch elmo or thomas until almost 9 or I have to read 20 books!  He just doesn't want to go to to bed (his bedtime was 730/800).  So maybe its an age thing.  He is also in the process of getting his molars and has been biting his blanket and sticking his fingers in this mouth.

I was also going to ask if anyone has started to move their S12er to a toddler bed?  DS can climb out of the crib and I don't want to move him to the toddler bed (it would mean a lot of changes for child proofing) but i am afraid of him hurting himself if he climbs out at bedtime. he is normally ok in the mornings.  Its the  reason i have to stay with for a hour or so until he falls asleep instead of what we use to let him do was cry for a few minutes and they he would calm himself down and realize it was time for bed and go to sleep.

There is a lot going on here. Are you letting him stay up watching TV, and not cutting him off after 2-3 books? You can say 'No!' It works if you are consistent. L asks to watch a show and read 20 books every night, but I say no more and put her down. She cries and goes to sleep. That is ok.

I also would not stay in the room for an hour. Is your crib made so you can put the mattress straight on the floor? Have you watched the climbing happen? Is he using a wall or landing on something soft? If you take those things away (move the crib away from the wall) that might help. 

smb+jab

Flamingemu said:

smb+jab said:

 Its the  reason i have to stay with for a hour or so until he falls asleep instead of what we use to let him do was cry for a few minutes and they he would calm himself down and realize it was time for bed and go to sleep.

There is a lot going on here. Are you letting him stay up watching TV, and not cutting him off after 2-3 books? You can say 'No!' It works if you are consistent. L asks to watch a show and read 20 books every night, but I say no more and put her down. She cries and goes to sleep. That is ok.

I also would not stay in the room for an hour. Is your crib made so you can put the mattress straight on the floor? Have you watched the climbing happen? Is he using a wall or landing on something soft? If you take those things away (move the crib away from the wall) that might help. 

The crib is about a three foot drop if he makes it over the top, I have seen him do it and he doesn't use the wall or anything to help.  He would land between the crib and the chair we sit in to read bedtime stories.  And i know I kind of let him get away with things while DH was away because it was easier to just let him put himself to sleep.

And I do cut him off with TV time or the number of books.  However, it's staying with him since I can no longer be sure that he wont hurt climb out and hurt himself since he has been pushing to stay up later.

I think maybe we need to come to terms with its time to re-arrange his room for a toddler setup....

Holly_1007

If you are having sleeping problems already, I can almost guarantee you are setting yourself up for a disaster if you let him out of the crib. Unless you take everything out of his room besides the bed, and are willing to lock him in his room. I think a lot of our s12 kiddos are struggling with sleep right now, so take some comfort in that it is probably his age, and you aren't the only one going through it. I would personally look into lowering the mattress if possible. I also am not one to lay in my kids room for hours, so there is that too. I have a kind of "tough love" approach to sleep training though, mostly due to the fact that once I close their bedroom doors I have exhausted every last ounce of patience in my body,and I need some time to myself.

Kissty

You are not alone in your sleep problems.  DS I think is also having night terrors or nightmares.  It breaks my heart when he wakes from a dead sleep screaming and when you go to him he clings to you for his dear life.  Thankfully it is no longer happening every night just 1 night of it is horrible.  Some nights he cries at bedtime other nights he doesn't. Trial and error over here.

hmp1

Leo was fighting bedtime so I changed up our routine a little bit and it worked like a charm. He is back to going to his crib without a fight. Instead of reading books in his chair, we lay down in the bed in his room to read, then I move him to his crib. I did this with James too but he was slightly older. It was a nice way to introduce a bed without having him sleep in it too. 

watercolor5

DD was having a horrible time getting to bed for a while, but she was never really great at it.  Then DH started just talking over what would happen when he left the room.  He told her that she could cry, but just for a little bit, and to not cry a lot.  Just talking through what she could and couldn't do, and getting her to think about it ahead of time made a world of difference, and now she only cries for a couple minutes or not at all, for the first time in her life.

I'd try really communicating with her, because they can begin to understand at this age. 

KKSBeans

K is having a really rough time with bed time too.