"shy" DD

fitmom82

DD is a real piece of work in several ways.  She was 4 in March, but easily looks 5 or 6 making her behavior more embarrassing.  She can be shy and uncomfortable, but it really comes out when it's time to say thank you.  Recently my aunt, who she rarely sees gave her a gift, DD didn't say a word.  Today a woman at a store gave DD and DS (2) a ball.  DS happily said thank you, not a word from DD.  I told both children to say thank you and when DD kept her mouth shut I spoke to her about it in the bathroom.  She told me "I know you always tell me to say thank you but I'm shy."  What really annoys me is that when she's exciting about something she's very chatty.  We were buying balloons for DS's birthday, who she adores as her baby brother, and she happily told the cashier how many of each color we had.  We recently had to go to the dr. for DS, the dr. asked about what songs DS liked, and she gladly started singing.  So is seems she's only shy when it's time to say thank you.  When I remind her of these examples of when she wasn't shy she swore they didn't happen, they're both within the past 2 months.  I don't want to put the gift-giver on the stop by making them feel awkward while I require DD to say thank you, but she's 4 years old and her random "I'm shy" excuse doesn't seem to fly.  I thought in private I could take away the gift, but in reality they're not usually gifts she'd be upset about loosing anyway.  I want her to learn to show appreciation though when someone makes a nice gesture.  Any suggestions?

NicoleWI

I think she is shy when she feels "on the spot" and knows she is expected to say something. When she is just comfortable and chatting on her own that's different. I agree w/ practicing, doing some role-play, and being patient with her. She will come around.