I'm finally getting help

Hummingbirdbaby3

After all of DH heart issues I have had multiple breakdowns, panic attacks, and trips to the doctor because I am sure I have cancer, or something terribly wrong with me. DH saw that this was serious and him realizing it, made me realize it too. I need help. I started feeling my neck, arms, etc. for lumps and of course found all sorts of stuff that freaked me out. I then made him feel and let me feel him to see if he had it and maybe it was normal. Yup, I need help. Today I went to the Dr for the "lumps" in my neck. She felt and said everything felt fine to her. I asked her for a psych referral. I will be going to see someone soon! I am relieved to start moving past this. I want another baby, and I want to enjoy our daily life. I am not enjoying everyday now because I am consumed with health problems. I was never like this before. It must be some sort of post trauma issue. I feel like every thought is about dying, health problems, not being here for my son and family, etc. Let me tell you, it's a terrible way to go through the day. But, hopefully today was a step in the right direction as I called a psychologist and am waiting for a call back to schedule. I just feel like we were hit by a bus, and thank God we did because he found out he had the aneurysm and it's fixed now. Now he is healthier than ever, I should be happy. But I feel like instead, I'm waiting for the next bus to hit us.

LimaD

Good for you, I'm glad you are seeking help!

I have had panic/anxiety attacks in the past. 4 times and they were the scariest things I've ever experienced. I honestly thought I was dying. It gave me a small taste of what you're struggling with. Good luck and I hope the best for you!

credcat7

I am so happy to hear you are taking care of you.  I hope that it helps you quickly, even if it means a forever change, getting the itch of anxiety off you will be a big relief.

tngrl3

Glad you are getting some help. It takes a lot of courage to admit there is something going on and ask for help. Hope things start looking up for you soon.

LBStewart

Good for you!  This is definitely a step in the right direction for you.  Hope everything works out.

maven212

I'm so happy to hear this. You have had a big two years. While having a baby and buying a house etc. are positive things, even positive change is stressful. DH's heart issue (aorta problem, right?) was such a shock, so scary and so stressful . I can't imagine what that is like. Recovering from the trauma of that experience takes time and work for sure.

It takes real effort and self-awareness to come to the realization that you need assistance. You should be proud of yourself of making this move. Best wishes and if you are comfortable, keep us posted.

jg1011

So glad you are getting help you need! That's a huge step! Your hubby and LO are lucky to have you... And you have a LONG life ahead of you together!

Keep us posted on your journey!

kerrigrooves

good for you! Quality of life is priority!

kjmommy1214

This makes me very happy for you. This step is the hardest. A good support system is the best thing that you can have. That includes a good doctor/psychologist. Take care of yourself.

kbl13

Happy to hear that you are taking steps to feel better, good for you!