UO Thursday!

Maelara

I didn't see this yet. Let's have some good ones today ladies

Note: this board isn't flame free.

marajay6

I've been surfing Pinterest for nursery decor ideas. I really am not a fan of the apparent trend to put the baby's name on the wall. It just seems stupid to me.

Eta for spelling and grammar. I need to start proof reading before I hit the post button.

Kristy774

Ok I know I'm gonna get flamed....It annoys me when people get so butt hurt over saying gender/sex. I realize the difference and I think when people do slip up and say sex instead of gender they aren't making a dig or trying to make a statement against being gay/bi/trans- I think they are honestly making a mistake and I'm not quite sure why others feel entitled to bite someone's head off over something that's clearly a mistake.

RedBirdFly

Kristy774 said:

Ok I know I'm gonna get flamed....It annoys me when people get so butt hurt over saying gender/sex. I realize the difference and I think when people do slip up and say sex instead of gender they aren't making a dig or trying to make a statement against being gay/bi/trans- I think they are honestly making a mistake and I'm not quite sure why others feel entitled to bite someone's head off over something that's clearly a mistake.

It pisses me off when people who advocate the sex/gender distinction go and call themselves "Team Pink" or "Team Blue" - which aren't gender neutral terms at all. If you're that hung up about it, say "Team Vagina" or "Team Penis," because really, I think its a bit hypocritical.

I don't care really sex vs gender when used for babies. It doesn't matter to me as much because we dress boys like boys (trucks and dinosaurs and blue) and girls like girls (flowers and dresses and pink) for the most part, so I don't see the point in fretting so much about it.

MollMoll4

I can't stand Beyonce. I think she is so grotesquely full of herself that I just roll my eyes every time I see a story about her. It doesn't help that most of them start with "bow down" or refer to her as Queen Bee.

KMW08

I don't mind popcorn ceilings and I like mine. I don't understand all the house shows where they flip out about them.

lisaren

Especially when every frickin place in society refers to it is gender also

Kristy774 said:

Ok I know I'm gonna get flamed....It annoys me when people get so butt hurt over saying gender/sex. I realize the difference and I think when people do slip up and say sex instead of gender they aren't making a dig or trying to make a statement against being gay/bi/trans- I think they are honestly making a mistake and I'm not quite sure why others feel entitled to bite someone's head off over something that's clearly a mistake.

CountryMama1114

@kristy774 and @RedBirdFly‌ I'm totally there with you. Yes, the terms sex and gender mean different things, however, I don't think anyone uses gender vs. sex on this forum on PURPOSE.

Hello?!?! Google sex reveal parties and see what you get!!

Maelara

When I post what team I am, I am so stealing team vagina or penis. Not because I'm one of those people that cares about the distinctions between sex and gender because I'm soo not. It's just super awesome

lisaren

I'll add mine from
Above here. I despise the word blump. And who the hell cares if someone says preggo.

PREGGO PREGGO PREGGO PREGGO.

SuperFreakedFirstTimer

Can I stupidly ask the difference between gender and sex since it's a topic right now?

marajay6

RedBirdFly said:

Kristy774 said:

Ok I know I'm gonna get flamed....It annoys me when people get so butt hurt over saying gender/sex. I realize the difference and I think when people do slip up and say sex instead of gender they aren't making a dig or trying to make a statement against being gay/bi/trans- I think they are honestly making a mistake and I'm not quite sure why others feel entitled to bite someone's head off over something that's clearly a mistake.

It pisses me off when people who advocate the sex/gender distinction go and call themselves "Team Pink" or "Team Blue" - which aren't gender neutral terms at all. If you're that hung up about it, say "Team Vagina" or "Team Penis," because really, I think its a bit hypocritical.

I don't care really sex vs gender when used for babies. It doesn't matter to me as much because we dress boys like boys (trucks and dinosaurs and blue) and girls like girls (flowers and dresses and pink) for the most part, so I don't see the point in fretting so much about it.

I totally agree. I am going to find out the sex of my baby so I can then buy clothes and nursery decor for the corresponding gender. Therefore I am going to find out which gender to prepare for. If down the road my child proves to be transgender then I will deal with it then. Quick google search says that about 0.3% of the US population is transgender. While we can assume that it may raise as our society becomes more accepting, it is still rather rare.

krgriffin26

Kristy774 said:

Ok I know I'm gonna get flamed....It annoys me when people get so butt hurt over saying gender/sex. I realize the difference and I think when people do slip up and say sex instead of gender they aren't making a dig or trying to make a statement against being gay/bi/trans- I think they are honestly making a mistake and I'm not quite sure why others feel entitled to bite someone's head off over something that's clearly a mistake.

I completely agree! I will be having a "gender reveal" party because 1. I think it's fun, 2. we're talking about a teeny baby 3. and as @CountryMama1114 mentioned, sex reveal party would probably be taken the wrong way. I will let my boy/girl decide later on what "gender" they are. But until then I feel it should be safe to assume until corrected.  

Maelara

SuperFreakedFirstTimer said:

Can I stupidly ask the difference between gender and sex since it's a topic right now?

Gender is between the ear and sex is between the legs

SuperFreakedFirstTimer

Maelara said:

Can I stupidly ask the difference between gender and sex since it's a topic right now?

Gender is between the ear and sex is between the legs

Hmm. I think I'll not state my UO on the matter then lol.

marajay6

Since we are going down this road, what do you think about transgender kids? I saw a news article a couple days ago about a transgender 7 year old. It is not the first time I have seen something like that. Maybe if it was my kid I would think differently, but to me 7 years old seems rather young for a person to realize that they identify as a boy or girl even though anatomically they aren't.

lisaren

MollMoll4 said:

I can't stand Beyonce. I think she is so grotesquely full of herself that I just roll my eyes every time I see a story about her. It doesn't help that most of them start with "bow down" or refer to her as Queen Bee.

oh I LOVEEEEEEEEEEE Beyonce

SuperFreakedFirstTimer

sj+cm131 said:

Since we are going down this road, what do you think about transgender kids? I saw a news article a couple days ago about a transgender 7 year old. It is not the first time I have seen something like that. Maybe if it was my kid I would think differently, but to me 7 years old seems rather young for a person to realize that they identify as a boy or girl even though anatomically they aren't.

Product of society.

suzyrenee

My UO is that I get irritated every time I see someone insist (like they are making a statement against anyone saying they have a bump) that you can't possibly have a bump yet, it's just bloat.

Everyone's body is different. If, for example, someone's frame is very small and their uterus is already the size of a grapefruit, that could definitely make their belly pop out.

ETA: LOL. It took me scrolling back up and seeing the picture of Prego a second time before I realized why it was there.

Emmy Lou

I dress my two little girls in pink, they watch princess movies, and I put bows in their long curly hair.  I tell them to "act like a lady".  If my third is a boy I will dress him in blue.  ::::GASP::::

MollMoll4

sj+cm131 said:

Since we are going down this road, what do you think about transgender kids? I saw a news article a couple days ago about a transgender 7 year old. It is not the first time I have seen something like that. Maybe if it was my kid I would think differently, but to me 7 years old seems rather young for a person to realize that they identify as a boy or girl even though anatomically they aren't.

7 is young, but I think it's impossible to judge without fully understanding. I will never know what it is like to not feel right in my own body. I imagine that deep of a physiological disconnect could be felt early.

RedBirdFly

suzyrenee said:

My UO is that I get irritated every time I see someone insist (like they are making a statement against anyone saying they have a bump) that you can't possibly have a bump yet, it's just bloat.

Everyone's body is different. If, for example, someone's frame is very small and their uterus is already the size of a grapefruit, that could definitely make their belly pop out.

ETA: LOL. It took me scrolling back up and seeing the picture of Prego a second time before I realized why it was there.

I have a super low pelvic bone - the lowest my MW has seen - and she's shocked I am not showing already!

@sj+cm131‌ - I think transgender kids are fine but I don't think its easy for them to know until puberty? I don't know, I'm not that knowledgable about gender facts.


Although as an aside, I really want to have a penis so that DH can suck my cock.

pennyandandy

sj+cm131 said:

Since we are going down this road, what do you think about transgender kids? I saw a news article a couple days ago about a transgender 7 year old. It is not the first time I have seen something like that. Maybe if it was my kid I would think differently, but to me 7 years old seems rather young for a person to realize that they identify as a boy or girl even though anatomically they aren't.

I am really undecided. On the one hand, I think it really is sometimes a matter of the parents just being more...(I am trying to use the right word, I don't want to offensive and I am not upset by this topic at all) agreeable to gender neutrality. Like, if we were at the store and Paul reached for a pair of glittery shoes, I would say "No, those are for girls, let's go find shoes for you." and a parent who is more open to gender neutrality would get the glittery shoes for their boy, so maybe their child is more...able to be transgendered because it is a readily available option for them. Does that make sense?

That is not at all to say that if my child came to me later in life and told me they seriously identified with the other sex that I would hate them or stop them. But I am not buying my 2 year old princess stuff and ruffles. (He does have baby dolls, a kitchen, etc.)

lisaren

suzyrenee said:

My UO is that I get irritated every time I see someone insist (like they are making a statement against anyone saying they have a bump) that you can't possibly have a bump yet, it's just bloat.

Everyone's body is different. If, for example, someone's frame is very small and their uterus is already the size of a grapefruit, that could definitely make their belly pop out.

ETA: LOL. It took me scrolling back up and seeing the picture of Prego a second time before I realized why it was there.

My lovely spaghetti meatball

ccam

Kristy774 said:

Ok I know I'm gonna get flamed....It annoys me when people get so butt hurt over saying gender/sex. I realize the difference and I think when people do slip up and say sex instead of gender they aren't making a dig or trying to make a statement against being gay/bi/trans- I think they are honestly making a mistake and I'm not quite sure why others feel entitled to bite someone's head off over something that's clearly a mistake.

This was going to be mine.  I can't stand when people correct others on this.

suzyrenee

Emmy Lou said:

I dress my two little girls in pink, they watch princess movies, and I put bows in their long curly hair.  I tell them to "act like a lady".  If my third is a boy I will dress him in blue.  ::::GASP::::

Same here, I treat my boy like a boy. I mean I'm not pushing the issue, but I'm not going to keep trucks away from him because of the slight chance that he'll identify as something other than male. Hell, even if that were to happen, it's not like he couldn't be a truck-appreciating transgender person.

I will always let him know that I'm there for him, no matter what. But I am not going to keep suggesting to him, "hey, in case you think you are not really a boy, that's great!" I think some people go to the point of suggesting/encouraging and a little kid is easily convinced. I am not saying I don't believe that people are born transgender, just that I'm not going to try to convince my son that he might be.

runningmama14

Kind of like a photo and story that went around the internet about a 5 year old boy that knew he was gay.  I really don't see how anyone can proclaim their sexual preference before even approaching puberty.

runningmama14

suzyrenee said:

Hell, even if that were to happen, it's not like he couldn't be a truck-appreciating transgender person. 

Just had to say that made me smile

MollMoll4

runningmama14 said:

Kind of like a photo and story that went around the internet about a 5 year old boy that knew he was gay.  I really don't see how anyone can proclaim their sexual preference before even approaching puberty.

I agree with you there. I think sexual preference is vastly different than gender identity though. I wouldn't say the two are alike.

jf198400

Emmy Lou said:

I dress my two little girls in pink, they watch princess movies, and I put bows in their long curly hair.  I tell them to "act like a lady".  If my third is a boy I will dress him in blue.  ::::GASP::::

I definitely buy my kids gender specific clothes and toys, but I love the fact that my girl and boy play with everything together. Dd is a total girly girl but she plays trains and loves to build with Legos. DS is all boy but sometimes he wants to wear a princess dress up gown and high heels. I'm glad I had a girl and boy so close in age b/c I don't think I would treat them as gender neutrally if I had only had one child.

runningmama14

MollMoll4 said:

Kind of like a photo and story that went around the internet about a 5 year old boy that knew he was gay.  I really don't see how anyone can proclaim their sexual preference before even approaching puberty.

I agree with you there. I think sexual preference is vastly different than gender identity though. I wouldn't say the two are alike.

Good point,  I wasn't trying to say they are the same, but could have been clearer.  I still think that identifying yourself as transgender at such a young age is probably very uncommon.  I don't think most 5-7 year olds have the ability to formulate such a clear sense of self awareness and societal awareness.

Kristy774

SuperFreakedFirstTimer said:

sj+cm131 said:

Since we are going down this road, what do you think about transgender kids? I saw a news article a couple days ago about a transgender 7 year old. It is not the first time I have seen something like that. Maybe if it was my kid I would think differently, but to me 7 years old seems rather young for a person to realize that they identify as a boy or girl even though anatomically they aren't.

Product of society.

I disagree.
Edit because I'm going to explain why....I truly believe that some kids "know" that early. I just do.

lisaren

Another UO.

And this one gets me heated.

The R word. (Retarded)

I find this highly offensive. I will correct someone who uses this word around me in conversation. I don't give a damn about being PC it's about respect for people who have a disability, like my daughter.
It's not funny. It's nothing to joke about.

My oldest son started a "stop the R word" campaign at his high school and it was a huge success. I was so proud of him. He stood up for his classmates and his sister.

Feegan

My sister is transgender, she came out in high school as gay and continued to progress in identifying herself as male. It wasn't shocking to anyone that knew her well but she's still not ready to drop the female pronouns, which is honestly kinda weird to me since she looks and lives life as a man. I can't say I totally understand her thought process about that particular aspect, but I will always support her and obviously 'him' when its time to change over. 

My UO: Everyone is worried about bloat and gaining too much weight and I'm over here drinking Ensure's every day trying to gain weight because my doc said I have too. I've wanted this baby for over a year and I'd happily gain 100 pounds if they told me too. Bring on the bloat!

ccam

@lisaren I definitely don't think that's a UO!!  I can not stand that word, it bothers me to no end.  My SIL uses it and refers to her 9 year old son as the R word, in a "joking" manner.  Wait til he uses that word in school.  I just don't get it.  DH has asked her multiple times not to use that word around our DS.

What your son did is amazing.  Good for him!

lisaren

I also do believe children are born and know. My daughter was not dressed in pink and bows but she is extremely girlie. She always has been. My daughter with special needs, medically fragile, is cognitively that of a newborn, hates dresses. She freaks out when she has a dress on. She has no cognitive ability to understand a dress, but I believe it's just what she knows. You put some shorts on her and she's happy. She doesn't like bows in her hair. My youngest, will put 24688 bows in her hair for school.

jlove253

I think regardless of where we stand on the transgender/sexual identity debates, we sexualize children and that doesn't help anything. Asking them if they think a boy/girl is cute, puttin them in provocative clothing/swim suits and telling them the other sex will notice how cute they are, encouraging them to get a boyfriend or girlfriend... It's unnecessary and trains their minds to think of themselves as sexual objects well before they are ready to process the idea that they are sexual beings.

That said, if DD comes home one day from preschool or elementary school and tells me she has a bf, I'm going to tell her they can be friends, but not bf/gf. She's too young for that.

lisaren

RedheadRunning said:

My sister is transgender, she came out in high school as gay and continued to progress in identifying herself as male. It wasn't shocking to anyone that knew her well but she's still not ready to drop the female pronouns, which is honestly kinda weird to me since she looks and lives life as a man. I can't say I totally understand her thought process about that particular aspect, but I will always support her and obviously 'him' when its time to change over. 

My UO: Everyone is worried about bloat and gaining too much weight and I'm over here drinking Ensure's every day trying to gain weight because my doc said I have too. I've wanted this baby for over a year and I'd happily gain 100 pounds if they told me too. Bring on the bloat!

In reference to weight gain, I recently lost 80 lbs since last summer, 120 since summer before, and I do worry about my weight gain. It was horribly hard to lose the weight. I was a size 20 now a size 10. Just because I didn't try for over a year to have this baby, doesn't mean it's not loved or wanted, but I will do what I can to make sure I keep my weight on the lower end, but do it healthy. Its an evil to know you need to gain weight, but know how hard it is to lose it.
Breastfeeding did not help me lose weight either. I was a weirdo who actually gained, when I weaned I list 22 lbs pretty quick.

My first son I gained 90 lbs. second son I gained 75. Last two I gained 30 each.
I

abbyful

RedheadRunning said:

My UO: Everyone is worried about bloat and gaining too much weight and I'm over here drinking Ensure's every day trying to gain weight because my doc said I have too. I've wanted this baby for over a year and I'd happily gain 100 pounds if they told me too. Bring on the bloat!

I'm technically underweight (non-pregnant BMI is 17.5). I had one doctor tell me to the gain at least 40 pounds while pregnant. I switched OB offices so I could deliver at the hospital I wanted to, there they were happy as long as my weight gain was steady. (Ended up gaining about 18 pounds.)

But yeah, I'm with you, I don't care how much I gain. It came off easily last time with breastfeeding. (Too easily even, I got down to a BMI of under 16 while breastfeeding DS. He was nice & chubby though!)

runningmama14

lisaren said:

I also do believe children are born and know. My daughter was not dressed in pink and bows but she is extremely girlie. She always has been. My daughter with special needs, medically fragile, is cognitively that of a newborn, hates dresses. She freaks out when she has a dress on. She has no cognitive ability to understand a dress, but I believe it's just what she knows. You put some shorts on her and she's happy. She doesn't like bows in her hair. My youngest, will put 24688 bows in her hair for school.

But those things don't make them transgender or not.  I was a tomboy and hated all things girle, but still identify as a straight female.  I know a young man that loved to wear his sister's dresses and sparkly shoes when he was younger.  Based on what I know and see now, several years later, he is a straight man.

I'm not saying that a 7 year old can't have feelings of not fitting in or being in the wrong body.  I just think the likelihood of that child being able to articulate those feelings and interpret what it means in regards to gender is low.  I'm guessing that most transgender people look back at their childhoods and always knew they were different, but didn't identify that difference until later.

mander82

I am going to throw a food one in here.....I know they can be frowned upon because there can be sooooooo many food UO's.....but....

I don't care for chocolate. 

I prefer peanut butter over chocolate any day.     I think chocolate pudding and ice cream are nasty.   I will not eat a hot fudge sundae.    I will occasionally eat a piece of chocolate cake,  but I have to be craving it.      Candy bars are good if they have more peanuts/peanut butter/caramel than chocolate.