I should've been prepared, I've been warned! (Long Vent)

dlems11

Short Story: Well I found THAT guy in my office, you know the one without a filter that seems to have an endless supply of comments about my changing shape, as if I need to be reminded or haven't quite noticed myself... Joy!

Long Story: I have been wearing very flowy shirts to work since I "popped" a couple weeks ago, not really consciously, its just been more comfortable. Although yesterday, for the first time, I decided to wear something a little more form fitted, only because I have been rocking the same 5 shirts for a while now. I was so unsure before I left the house in the morning because I just felt so out there, I don't how else to describe it. I even asked DH his opinion and he very sweetly said I looked beautiful and was happy to see me "bumping out", so I left the house a little more confident.
When I got to work, I went to check in with a co-worker who sits in a larger office space with a number of other people. THAT one guy turned around when I came in and let out a very loud "WHOA" causing everyone to turn, followed by "You got so big". In the moment I laughed it off, continued with my conversation then proceeded to go back to my office, shut the door and cry. I don't know if I'm more upset by his comment or my reaction!
I am not usually an emotional person, but this pregnancy has certainly brought up the tears on numerous occasions. Now, I feel more self conscious than ever, although I will admit I was already struggling with the rapid changes my body has undergone in the last few weeks.
Sorry for how long this turned out to be, I guess I had a lot more to vent than I anticipated. I guess the moral of the story is you can't quite be completely prepared for the THAT one guy, no matter how many people warn you its coming!

MrsLaLaBug

Why don't you dry those eyes, go back out there, and when you walk past him say, "WHOA.  You got so RUDE".  See if that doesn't shut him the fuck up.

kayemgi

I'm sorry that happened to you. What a moron.

I had the opposite happen yesterday, I had a friend that I hadn't seen in awhile exclaim, "You don't look pregnant at all!" I was getting proud of my bump and that bummed me out pretty hard. But I think it's just about the fit of clothes we are wearing and other people's perceptions. Just focus on how you feel about your bump and block out everyone else's dumb opinions!

ham0216

Do we work with the same a-hole?  That sounds just like a guy in my office.  I'm so sorry he was such a jerk to you.  I know sometimes I get so caught off guard by the stupid comments, I later beat myself up for not standing up for myself.  The other day I was talking to my co-workers and made mention about eating two cheeseburgers for lunch... he butts in "Oh yea, we can definitelyyy tell!"... Just days after he proceeded to tell me "I hope you feel better than you look, bc you look like shit" - his exact words.

Just try to block him out! You are growing something so precious, & if putting down a pregnant woman just for laughs makes his day, then I feel bad for him. Don't let him get to you - rock that bump 

dlems11

Thanks Ladies, I really like the stapler idea too! It's still just shocking to me how people seem to lose their filter around pregnant woman or maybe I just notice it more now.
My friend whose daughter just turned 1 year a couple weeks ago warned me it only gets worse, "Wait until they comment about how you look like you're about to pop". Great!

camichael84

Try not to listen to the idiot. And remember that you're suppose to be getting bigger because you're growing your baby.

I had a coworker tell me the other day that she thought I was having a girl because I'm carrying wide. That bothered me a lot, too. I'm pear shaped as it is and self conscious about it, and the last thing I want to hear is that I'm getting wider.

bethybeach

Wow, these people are so unbelievable.  My mother's husband pulled that type of thing on me when I was only 5 weeks.  My clothes were tight when I saw him so I probably had a muffin top at the time and he proceeded to say after we said we were expecting, 'I knew something was up because I was wondering if you have the same stomach problems as your mom' Long story but my mom can look 6 months pregnant due to bloating and they don't know why.

Do your best not to let them bother you.  I assume these people just aren't around pregnant people and they just really don't know how to react.  I don't think they mean it.

Stacylarae

That's horrible! My aunt who knows I have body image issues asked if I was having twins. Once you are pregnant people think it's okay to say all kinds of rude comments.

Ciardasully

What a jerk!

mrsH1112

Ugh...how annoying.  Not cool.

I had something opposite last week.  A male co worker came up to me at work and said "Look at you...I just love looking at a pregnant woman, so beautiful"

Creepy

nilvero

People are something else. I've gotten both comments at work 'Wow, you've gotten so big this week!" and"Man, you don't even look pregnant, you sure there's a baby in there!"

Both completely suck and I'm sorry that guy was such a jerk about it! Dry your tears and be proud of your bump!

Ashleyrfiles

The guy sounds like a douche. I think baby bumps are adorable. I don't understand why people think they can say whatever they want to a pregnant woman. 

You're growing a baby! So of course your body has to change for that. But I do understand not being completely comfortable with how fast your body does change! My boss actually side-eyed me the other day when he saw my bump, but I have no filter with him and said "I'm growing a person, of course I'm getting bigger! You being very judgmental!" 

drae86

Dude is a jerk, but I do have to comment because I almost hit the 'love it' button on your post which was venting but it was immediately after your DH told you that you looked beautiful and it made me smile. I got the positive out of your story.

 

sapphires-and-diamonds

What a dick. I will say though, because I'm a stalker, I went back and looked at the one pic you posted for HDBD.  My first thought was "she's so adorable with a perfect, cute bump". You look great. Fuck him.

ashleymae6

I deal with someone similar at my work. He comments on how I have started waddling a bit as I walk. It totally sucks that people don't know when to keep their mouths shut. Just remember we are all beautiful and our bodies are creating life.

brittneyandadam

Yeah...I would have said to him in a patronizing tone "Well, that's what happens when you grow a human in your uterus." I have zero tolerance for people like that.

ashaw512

Wow what an ass. I'm sorry you have to deal with ppl like that. I would probably have been a straight up bitch, I'm not a mean person at all but I would have let my crazy out on that guy. And maybe throw a stapler at his head too you have baby growing inside of you tell the guy to kiss your pg ass and leave his rude ass comments at the door. Rock the bump.

JenniferAnn1972

Different take but same no filter- One of my customers, a male physician, told me how sexy he thinks pregnant women are. He made my skin crawl.

whataboutscience

A lot of people seem to point out my bump or talk about my belly. As someone formally fat, it bothers me, but I also think they are trying to show their excitement.

Ashleyrfiles

ashleymae6 said:

I deal with someone similar at my work. He comments on how I have started waddling a bit as I walk. It totally sucks that people don't know when to keep their mouths shut. Just remember we are all beautiful and our bodies are creating life.

This! I feel like this is why we do HDBD on here - our bodies are doing beautiful, amazing things right now and it's nice to be proud of it and show it off! 

[Deleted User]

What a douche! I saw your HDBD pic from yesterday, and you look gorgeous!

punnybunny

Why can't people just say something to the effect of "you look great"? Why does it have to be about size? I don't want people telling me I look small or that my belly definitely popped or that I'm getting big. (Duh, jerk. There's a baby in there.) I just want to be told I look good and then handed a piece of chocolate. Is that so hard? ;-)