Ok, I have to vent somewhere!!!!!

Maxsmommy123112

Ok I have to vent somewhere. Someone on FB said they were sick and tired and pissed that everyone keeps telling them "baby will come when baby is ready". That they just want the baby to come now. It's a public forum and this was my response:

I just want to lend a different point of view to this...when someone has experienced pregnancy loss, in my case multiple, and someone is complaining about baby
not coming that is my response "baby will come when ready". It's my way of saying I pray your baby comes when ready and not before like my 2 angel babies did. I think there are reasons people say the things they do and reasons people are sensitive to pregnant women complaining. Just something to think about. (Copy and pasted)

I didn't mean it offensively and I don't think it was said offensively but to be honest, it bothers me that people want their babies to come so early. Baby WILL come when baby is ready and my babies didn't even get that chance!

Well here's why I am so upset, someone said to me "you get to 40 weeks pregnant and see how you feel".

I was/am appalled that after learning someone has experienced pregnancy loss another mother would be so extremely hurtful. It brought tears to my eyes.

Maybe I will be exhausted. Maybe I will be in pain. Maybe it will be the hardest thing I will ever have to go through (IF I GET THERE) but I will not publicly complain (my choice) but I certainly wont get mad when people say baby will come when ready!!

Please tell me I'm not alone!

Maxsmommy123112

And complaining is one thing but the awful woman that had the nerve to say "get to 40 weeks and then complain"?!? How cold is her heart to say that to someone knowing they have miscarried?!

longcat07

what a terrible way to treat someone who just spoke up about her own losses.  omg.  i've known too many people with losses to be so callous, even before mine.

AprSnow59

Wow.  Well, to start - good for you for speaking up about your losses.  I have been more open about this second loss but I am still not "out" on facebook and part of the reason why is that I know I am not strong enough right now.  I am scared that someone will say something to me without understanding the implication of how it makes me hurt... so thank you for doing this.  I hope to someday be able to do the same.  You did a brave thing by speaking out and even if this (horrible) person said such a hurtful thing, I believe that others read your post and will hopefully be more sensitive in what they say in the future.  (((big giant hugs)))

stephy1221

"wait to 40 weeks" was a total asshole, Douche nugget, dumbass, cold hearted, I am running out of swears but I think you get the point response to someone who has had a loss. the end.

p.s. hugs

Eveiii

Can I jump into her fb account and kick her?

longcat07

stephy1221 said:

"wait to 40 weeks" was a total asshole, Douche nugget, dumbass, cold hearted, I am running out of swears but I think you get the point response to someone who has had a loss. the end.

p.s. hugs

some others i've heard that are apt: twat waffle, hoecake, rutabaga hag, douche canoe, douchenozzle, f***wad, asshat, etc...

Yaz14

That person sucks!

Maxsmommy123112

abseptember said:

Maxsmommy123112 said:

And complaining is one thing but the awful woman that had the nerve to say "get to 40 weeks and then complain"?!? How cold is her heart to say that to someone knowing they have miscarried?!

I have to ask... did you check back?  Did anyone say anything like "hey shit for brains... do you realize you're being an insensitive biotch?"  I seriously think if I read that I'd have to point out what an asshat she was being.  

_______________________________

Oh, you would think right? NOPE! Quite the opposite actually they bashed me so bad I eventually unfollowed the post because I was getting too upset. One other person mentioned something about suffering infertility and that they don't like when people complain either. Basically people just jumped on the two of us.

One lady told me to "calm my tatas" and quit making everything about "me, me, me". Another said me and that other poor woman were bitter and jaded and to "get over ourselves".

Honestly I couldn't believe they were so nasty and mean and not one person stood up to them except for the two of us and a friend of mine that later joined the post. I felt bad for the other girl bc at some point I just gave up and they just kept attacking her.

I can wrap my head around people not getting it, never gone through it and just not comprehending the gravity. Ok, fine. But wtf makes someone think it's ok just to be downright cruel and hurtful?! There is no excuse for that behavior.

The friend of mine (that joined the post) has had multiple pregnancy losses and also lost her baby when he was a few months old. She belongs to that site also. This was her response to them:

"You have some real fucking gumption talking to a woman who's had two losses like that! You have no clue what it's like to not hear your child's heart beat...or worse, hold your child at 17 days (who came at 43 weeks btw and I never once complained) as they take their final breaths. She would KILL to be in your shoes, 41 weeks pregnant. There is NOTHING offensive about telling someone your baby will come when he / she is ready. At least you have one..at least yours is healthy. Just because you are pregnant, it's not a free pass to be an insensitive cunt. Be fucking blessed you have 3 living, healthy children instead of 1 in 3 or my case 1 in 5. Hopefully you'll think next time before being so bitchy. Pregnancy isn't torrents and it's NOT a free pass." (Copy and pasted)

Well said, dontcha think?

Eveiii

OMG I want to be her friend. She told those cows how it is! High five to her!

I can't believe how shit the human kind can be. Makes me sick, no wonder this world is messed up.

AggieBeth06

I just want to hug you and your friend for being so brave right now! My SIL is almost 39 weeks and has been complaining for the past two. Don't get me wrong, I can only imagine how uncomfortable it is. When you're in physical pain, you don't think right. You think about your pain and not how what you say or do hurts others. I'm glad you had the guts to call her on it.

longcat07

people really suck.  that's all i got.  and hugs.

EDIT: except for your friend.  she's pretty awesome.  lol

Yaz14

Omg what horrible, ignorant bitches those women are, attacking you like that. They have no idea! 

I want to hug that friend of yours though! What a beautiful response!

TalulaJ

That is just awful. It always reminds me how important perspective can be when you have to deal with people who absolutely have none! Ugh.