April 2014 Moms

Pissed off and feeling lost.

So tonight my DH text me and says he's going to Taco Bell before he gets home.. I said oh okay that's cool see you soon... And then I get a text saying that his ex girlfriend is going to come up there with him... (I've had some issues with them hanging out in the past. A lot of heavy flirting goes on when they are together.) so I ask him not to hang out with her tonight cause I'm it comfortable with it and I just want him home.. Then he sends me a 3 page text taking about I was overreacting and how im in the wrong cause I don't want him to hang out with her..
Am I overreaching? I'm just feeling really lost and hurt
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Re: Pissed off and feeling lost.

  • He never does this. Like ever and now that I'm pregnant he wants to hang out with her?? It's just making me spin my wheels. I don't think he would ever cheat on me but the fact that i told him I didn't want him around her cause it makes me uncmorfable should have been enough for him to leave.. Sorry for the spelling I'm shaking cause I'm sondamn mad
    BiggerinRealLifescoassinKarianne02nikki912
  • So not wrong.. I would be a raging she-hulk if my husband did that to me right now. If that happened to me, hubby would be sleeping on the couch with no dinner or conversation for a week or more. And I'd probably tell his mom. Just to be really mean about it! But like I said you wouldn't like me when I'm angry! (She-hulk)
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    seannasmommy16KendraL86
  • It won't happen again? WTF! He knew he shouldn't be doing it but he did it anyway! You can't do something you know is wrong and then expect to get away with only a "sorry." Consequences, baby! His butt deserves to be in the dog house for awhile!
    seannasmommy16BiggerinRealLifekrazy6262
  • I've actually heard a lot of stories of men that cheat on women pregnant with their kid. I know I've been there before. I'm sick at home and big pregnant and he was out mingling and pretending to be single. His excuse was that he could handle my complaining and realizing his coming and going party days are over. I hope this isn't the case for you. Best wishes!
    seannasmommy16padma55
  • No you are not overreacting!!! I would be flipping. DH would be buried in the basement!!!! I credit a large part of my relationship success (8 years together 4 married) to leaving all our ex's where they belong, in the past. We also never make friends with the opposite sex without the other knowing who they are, and having the option of getting to know them.
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    seannasmommy16BiggerinRealLifedeidremaria[Deleted User]
  • P.S ^^ That post was about my oldest sons dad. No way would my bf now be that stupid. My bad
    seannasmommy16[Deleted User]
  • I really hope he's not cheating. He just walked in the door.. I put a pillow and a blanket on the couch for him. He text and said "guess I'm out here?" I responded with "yup better enjoy you will be there for a while."
    Asshole
    [Deleted User]kateleestar[Deleted User]
  • Not cool, but I might forgive it once. A second time, no way! If my DH did that I'd give it to him straight: "I want to be the one putting on makeup, real clothes, and hanging off your arm, even if it is just Taco Bell! Instead I'm stuck at home bloated and pregnant with OUR child, trying to put OUR daughter to bed. WTF are you thinking?!!"

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    seannasmommy16hordol
  • It's simple; if your PAETNER is uncomfortable with ANY friend of yours from the opposite sex you have to respect that and either stop being friends with that person or always have your partner there when hanging out with that friend in an effort to show that you respect your partner. That being said he shouldn't even be hanging out with her especially if you've asked him not to before. Since he insists on playing unfairly I'd do as the above poster suggested and hang out with my ex and say it's not a big deal.
    seannasmommy16
  • Thanks Guy for the support! I'm going to bed and sleeping on it and hope I don't smother him with the pillow in the Morning. :) thanks again. It's really nice to have people when you have no friends. Even if it is online.
    deidremariakateleestardashajeanEija3014
  • He messed up. But don't go to bed mad. I wouldn't. I would go there and talk to him and explain one last time.
    deidremaria
  • Your boyfriend should absolutely accept anything that makes you uncomfortable as a no go. Ridiculous!
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    seannasmommy16
  • You do not need this stress! That man is your husband and he should be that to you now, more than ever! Hopefully the two of you can talk this out and come to an agreement so that this never happens again because IMO it never should. Hang in there, I also hope you got some sleep! :)
    seannasmommy16
  • Nope. Not overreacting IMO. DH and I never see our exes. That would be way weird, and most of ours didn't end well. I have one that I'm cool with, and in the extremely rare occasion that we see each other DH comes too. Not because we flirt at all, but because it makes DH comfortable. But we have a rule, too, that we don't spend time with friends of the opposite sex alone. Not because anything would happen, but because we always want our marriage to be above reproach. We never want someone to be like, "oh, I saw Christy out with so and so the other day. What do you think was going on?" None of our friends ever had a problem with us all hanging out together. And if any did, well, then thy really have no business hanging out with my husband alone, do they?
    Completely agree with this: Dh and I have the same rule. It has nothing to do with not trusting each other, it's just that a) we don't need other people making assumptions, b) it may be platonic for you but you never know what the other person may be thinking or feeling, and c) most people don't wake up one day and think "I'm going to cheat on my spouse today!". It just happens. So neither of us want to put ourselves in a situation where we aren't putting our marriage first.

    OP I would definitely not be okay with that!! It's super weird that he felt the need for her company at taco bell of all places...
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    deidremariaseannasmommy16BiggerinRealLife
  • Hell no. Occasionally running into ex? Ok. Making plans specifically to hang out with his ex? Absolutely not. He has plenty of other friends!

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    seannasmommy16britrundellBiggerinRealLife
  • He messed up. But don't go to bed mad. I wouldn't. I would go there and talk to him and explain one last time.

    This comment is just what all us ryled up pregnant women needed to see. It reminds me of that one friend who know just what to say to keep everyone level headed :-)
    seannasmommy16
  • His priority should be you and the baby. End of story. See how he'd like it if YOU and the baby hang out with an ex of YOURS.
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    seannasmommy16deidremaria
  • I do not think you are being unreasonable about this request, if it makes you uncomfortable as it would make most of us uncomfortable you have a valid point.

    I don't know him so its hard to give advice on how to treat this situation now. I do believe that communication wins out with any personality type and if you are scared of a yelling match meet him somewhere public it helps to keep both parties civil.

    Good luck with this. I was cheated on with my last pregnancy (different father) so even though I trust my bf more than anyone the ugly thought still creeps into my mind. Pregnancy does make us feel more vulnerable and our self esteems take a hit so our thoughts can go a little crazy. Well that's me anyway. :)

     

     

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    seannasmommy16
  • That's def not ok! He needs to come home and bring you some Taco Bell too! :) it's def inconsiderate if him.

    Sometimes in discussion with my DH, if he's arguing I'll ask. " do you really not understand why I'm upset? Or why this is not ok"
    Usually he stops and says, yes I guess I do

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    seannasmommy16
  • Well I woke up this morning with a dozen roses and cheesecake. :) but im still a little mad at him. Not as mad as last night
    deidremaria[Deleted User]
  • I wouldn't be cool with that at all.  I am still friends with a few of my exes, but we never hang out-ever.  We have been to events where my exes were there, but my hubby was always with me.  Hope sleeping on the couch makes your man apologetic. 
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  • thomas930thomas930 member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 250 Answers 500 Love Its
    edited October 2013
    I
    Your life is really dramatic.
    Yeah. Honestly, I am amazed that TB is as friendly and warm to you as it is. I have seen people half as dramatic/ AWish get smoked. 

    Its like the internet version of diplomatic immunity. 
    I am kind of surprised people believe all this drama.
    More like ignoring it now. After all the controversial posts, that really just seemed like trying to stir up drama since they were all one after the other...I just find it AW-ish.

    edit: typing with one hand causes me to leave out words 
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    AndrewsgalSisimama10SerenlaMamaFantastic
  • It's pretty easy to see she is still trying to hit controversial subjects without just flat out asking since she was called on that. Yesterday it was teen moms and being friends with Exs. Come on people it is so obvious it hurts.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
    Sisimama10thomas930Serenlajap618
  • It's pretty easy to see she is still trying to hit controversial subjects without just flat out asking since she was called on that. Yesterday it was teen moms and being friends with Exs. Come on people it is so obvious it hurts.

    IDK what to believe but I feel sad for her if its true. It's not an uncommon story...loser baby daddies crossing boundaries
  • It's pretty easy to see she is still trying to hit controversial subjects without just flat out asking since she was called on that. Yesterday it was teen moms and being friends with Exs. Come on people it is so obvious it hurts.

    IDK what to believe but I feel sad for her if its true. It's not an uncommon story...loser baby daddies crossing boundaries
    But that's the point she has SO many of these "not uncommon" stories! She had a guy approach her in a Christian book store saying to give her kids away because she's a teen mom, this story of her husband with his ex, the story about being a strong teen mom on her own, etc etc.
  • It's pretty easy to see she is still trying to hit controversial subjects without just flat out asking since she was called on that. Yesterday it was teen moms and being friends with Exs. Come on people it is so obvious it hurts.

    IDK what to believe but I feel sad for her if its true. It's not an uncommon story...loser baby daddies crossing boundaries
    I don't buy any on this but if it is true this is why babies have no business having babies.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
    [Deleted User]
  • I say don't give your power up to the ex. She doesn't deserve one more ounce of your focus or emotions. That's the power of the ex to play on our own insecurities. I wouldn't pay one more second towards any thoughts of her. Instead focus on communicating with your man and creating a stronger bond so no woman has the power to come between you. Being angry at him will push him away and cause more doubt for you. Instead focus on expressing how you feel without blaming him and then ask him how it can be fixed. My guess is he wants to feel better about it too. I agree he should not be going out to meet her. That is inconsiderate of your feelings and your relationship. A real heart to heart conversation needs to happen with a resolution to overcome the interference from her. Good luck! You can overcome this by creating an understanding between him and you as long as you don't blame him. Tell him how it makes you feel genuinely!
  • Ps. Why are they hanging out at Taco Bell? Surely he isn't spitting game to his ex at a booth in Taco Bell... I'm sorry but that just made me laugh.
    [Deleted User]Sisimama10[Deleted User]britrundell
  • "

    It's pretty easy to see she is still trying to hit controversial subjects without just flat out asking since she was called on that. Yesterday it was teen moms and being friends with Exs. Come on people it is so obvious it hurts.

    IDK what to believe but I feel sad for her if its true. It's not an uncommon story...loser baby daddies crossing boundaries
    But that's the point she has SO many of these "not uncommon" stories! She had a guy approach her in a Christian book store saying to give her kids away because she's a teen mom, this story of her husband with his ex, the story about being a strong teen mom on her own, etc etc.
    I feel so confused and a little dirty. Did my European time difference block all judgement again. What teen mom story?

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    cfthoct292011
  • It was a post about her being pissed off in a Christian book store yesterday. This guy started praying for her children bc she's young and he told her she should've given her children away...
  • Now I'm getting kinda pissed off! What don't y'all believe? The fact I'm a teen parent? The fact a rude comment was made to me the other day? The fact that my husband fucked up? Would you like pics of the text he sent me last night? I'll post them, would you like to see my driver license to see how old i am?
    Is it that hard to believe that I'm a teen mom who got my shit together and took care of my child because i wasn't going to be a shitty parent? There have been 2 post about shit that has happened to me. It's all real. Trust me I wish it fucking wasn't. The fact your saying this is why babies don't deserve to have babies pisses me off. I've done a damn good job at raising my child. If you don't believe my post then fine but don't sit here and say I don't need to have kids cause i take care of them just fine. And also there's 24 hour store called Walmart that sells flowers and cheesecake.
    Proudmommytobe112013
  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    Tenth Anniversary 10000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its
    edited October 2013
    Flowers and cheesecake from Walmart would totally buy my forgiveness (sarcasm font on)
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
    Shelbysteffens
  • He was at Taco Bell because he his the GM of the store he's at. We have been together for 2 years. He knows not to do that again. Last night I could have dealt with it differently but I was in the rage.
  • I kind of think that if he had left to go to the store to go get presents for you after coming home and you put him on the couch there would have been and "omg he left" post...
    Andrewsgal[Deleted User]britrundell
  • I don't know what MUD is. I assume made up drama? But it's not made up. Trust me i wish It was. But I don't need to sit here and go back and forth with you. This is 2 post in the last almost 2 months that I've been on this site with drama in my life.
  • MUD = made up drama
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    kwolslager
  • I don't know what MUD is. I assume made up drama? But it's not made up. Trust me i wish It was. But I don't need to sit here and go back and forth with you. This is 2 post in the last almost 2 months that I've been on this site with drama in my life.
    You spent all last week trying to get people riled up with one controversial subject or another, after people called you on it two controversial things happen to you in one day? Okay.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
    Sisimama10thomas930Serenlakwolslager
  • Wait... So you're saying your husband took his ex girlfriend to hangout at the place he is GM of? Oh hell no.
  • I will no longer post my MUD on here and I won't ask for y'all's opinions on topics. Sorry for the drama I've made y'all read.
    Andrewsgal
  • Hell no. Hellllllllllll no. H would be dead if he pulled some shit like that. 
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  • SerenlaSerenla member
    10000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Second Anniversary
    edited October 2013
    thomas930 said:



    Now I'm getting kinda pissed off! What don't y'all believe? The fact I'm a teen parent? The fact a rude comment was made to me the other day? The fact that my husband fucked up? Would you like pics of the text he sent me last night? I'll post them, would you like to see my driver license to see how old i am?
    Is it that hard to believe that I'm a teen mom who got my shit together and took care of my child because i wasn't going to be a shitty parent? There have been 2 post about shit that has happened to me. It's all real. Trust me I wish it fucking wasn't. The fact your saying this is why babies don't deserve to have babies pisses me off. I've done a damn good job at raising my child. If you don't believe my post then fine but don't sit here and say I don't need to have kids cause i take care of them just fine. And also there's 24 hour store called Walmart that sells flowers and cheesecake.

    More like every post that you start is full of drama, be it a controversial topic (not that we don't mind a good debate but you started a lot and it seemed like you were fishing to start something) or something dramatic happened to you. If this is all really happening then you are a magnet for it. You also seem to like to throw out that you were a teen mom...we get it, we do. But you are what, 20 now....you aren't really carrying yourself in a mature way on here. You seem to need a lot of attention. 
    Is this an appropriate time to say "baby mama drama?" ;)
    Edit face.




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  • You know whenpeople tell you gullible isn't in the dictionary? Yea, I fell for that. Sheesh. I should stop being a zombie!!
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    zoopsiedaisyckred27smayvilletcwink
  • Ex's are bad news. Always. Been there.

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    Sisimama10[Deleted User]Sheybre
  • Nope, not doubting that you're a teen mom. At all.
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    Sisimama10AndrewsgalGoldenGibson
  • I'm just glad my drama is limited to pooping.

    I snorted so loud when I read this.. SNORTED! Hehe

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    [Deleted User]myschlovekwolslager
  • Let's see the pics of the texts!!! Ok I'm completely sucked into this forum now haha :\">
    Sisimama10myschlove[Deleted User]cfthoct292011


  • I see it suggested all the time that people try babygaga. In this case.... I really suggest you try babygaga. 


    And yeah, no one is doubting you're a teen mom. And actually I am not doubting your DH went to Taco Bell with his possible GF. That kind of stuff happens to teen moms. 

    I dont want Walmart cheesecake. Yuck. Early FFFC: When I was pregnant with DD4 I bought an entire Cheesecake Factory Godiva cheesecake. I wont say how long it lasted. Lets pretend it was a long time. 
    We only recently got a Cheesecake Factory... the wait to get in is typically 3 hours. I make my own :p

    OK but seriously, you have to try the Godiva chocolate one. F**k the food and waiting for a table, just get it to go. No one can make cheesecake at home like that. Its created by little angels with magic sugar dust. You're welcome in advance. 

    True story bro.



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  • I've never seen a Godiva store, only the boxed chocolates they sell. That cheesecake sounds heavenly
  • Seriously, seriously pissed off that I am thousands of miles from a Cheesecake factory. Because now, that's all I want for dinner. A cheesecake. 
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    [Deleted User]
  • I love that this has turned into a Cheesecake thread lol. I'll try the Caramel Pecan Turtle Cheesecake, please. Yum!
    SerenlaTeresa1896Mrs550
  • Sisimama10Sisimama10 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    edited October 2013
    When I worked at Barnes and noble we sold slices and whole frozen Cheesecake Factory cheesecakes.... We sold TONS around thanksgiving and Christmas. $35 for the whole cake. Godiva and pumpkin were the two biggest sellers. Also had white Choc raspberry, lemon something and a few others. Big hit for us in the cafe.
  • I've been searching cheesecake recipes for the past hour. I NEED IT.
    [Deleted User]
  • Rogue237 said:
    I love that this has turned into a Cheesecake thread lol. I'll try the Caramel Pecan Turtle Cheesecake, please. Yum!
    I had that one last time we went. It was amazing.

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    Rogue237
  • Oh and I had taco bell for lunch thanks to this thread.
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    Sisimama10Rogue237thomas930
  • I don't think you are not overreacting. He should have enough respect for you to stay away from this other woman.

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  • Am I the only one that can't stand cheesecake and has never even seen a Cheesecake Factory? I had never even heard of it until I watched the BBT....

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  • Is there such a thing as pumpkin cheese cake because I want that.
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  • Serenla said:
    I just ate 4 pickles and an apple, they were not the cheesecake that I wanted.
    Mmmm but 4 pickles and an apple sounds fantastic too. 
    Serenla
  • Rogue237 said:


    Serenla said:

    I just ate 4 pickles and an apple, they were not the cheesecake that I wanted.

    Mmmm but 4 pickles and an apple sounds fantastic too. 

    It was!



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  • I had the best pumpkin cheesecake ever from a tiny coffee bar/dessert shop in Anchorage.  Nothing else can compare!
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  • Oh I'm having dinner at a friend's home tonight. I'm bringing over chicken salad sandwiches, and she is getting a cheesecake sampler. This just made me not want to wait another 2 hours! Also, I like how OP said she would stop posting MUD. So you're saying it was?

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  • We don't have a cheese cake factory anywhere near us. But... We have an Olive Garden and this just reminded me that I wanted to go back to OG and try their pumpkin cheesecake! First few days I hadn't been craving Olive Garden and now I want some and some cheesecake for dessert!
    [Deleted User]
  • Mmm cheesecake. This thread turned right around! Love!
    [Deleted User]britrundell
  • Am I the only one that can't stand cheesecake and has never even seen a Cheesecake Factory? I had never even heard of it until I watched the BBT....

    Blasphemer!!! Heresy!!!
    This one made me laugh loud enough to have to explain to DH. He man-giggled. Hijacking threads with cake for the win! Shunnnnn!

    This also made DH aware of the fact that I have never tried a Cheesecake Factory cheesecake, which he finds unacceptable. There should be epic cheesecake in my near future now! :D
    [Deleted User][Deleted User]kwolslager
  • They have a Godiva chocolate cheesecake at the cheesecake faxtory. Is they what you're talking about?
    [Deleted User]
  • I just wanted to say I love you ladies...you can turn anything into a thread about food!!!

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    thomas930[Deleted User]
  • Sheybre said:

    I've been searching cheesecake recipes for the past hour. I NEED IT.

    @Sheybre google Tyler Florence's ultimate cheesecake. And thank me later. Its the best!!! I wouldn't bother with the blueberry sauce that goes with it.

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