Teacher telling parents

jrosa1

I teach kindergarten and we are in our 5th week of school. I am 20 weeks and I'm just barely starting to show (FTM). I talked to my principal about wanting to tell the parents and the kids because I don't want to have to keep it a big secret. She wants me to wait until it is very obvious and someone asks me (parent or student). She even suggested waiting until right before Christmas!!! Her reason for wanting me to wait is that she thinks parents will worry and start emailing her . To me, that is really selfish of her and I feel like I should be able to do what I want. But, I am not going to go against what she wants. Here is my thought...next week I was going to write that I'm expecting in my weekly newsletter. I will tell the parents in the letter that I will be talking to the students on Monday in case the parents want to talk with their children ahead of time. My plan is to show this to the principal and just tell her I am sending it home, but I wanted to make sure she read it first. This way, I'm not really giving her an option. What are other people's thoughts? Do you think 6 weeks into school is too early to tell? Should I wait longer or stick with my plan? Thanks for any suggestions!

MissDemeanor

I'm not sure about your timing question, I can see your point, but the principles also. I do agree with you however, about telling the parents in advance. At that age plenty of your kids will be wondering how Ms. Jrosa1's baby got in her tummy! and that is the parents job to decide what to say.

daleafs

I agree with PP, it seems like your principal is only looking out for herself and is making her job easier. Im not sure how the teacher-principal relationship works where you are, but where I am the principal really has little say over these types of matters. If its important for you to be out than I would go ahead with your plan. Since she has already told you her feelings, definately courtesy notify her about what you are doing. Good Luck!

shellbell3845

I'm also a teacher, and I've had to stop my principal from telling people until after my a/s. She's super excited about baby and wants everyone to share in the excitement. I work with a couple of my students outside the school day (piano lessons), and I did tell those parents before open house because I didn't want them to think I was intentionally hiding it from them. That's not the case at all, I just wanted to wait until after the a/s. I think your plan sounds great. I'm planning to tell my kiddos tomorrow -- but I'm a "specials" teacher, so I doubt it will cause much anxiety for parents. Good luck!

gingerm84

I can totally relate to your situtation, I also teach Kinder and it will be a hard transitition for them and the parents when you leave!

I have already told my parents, at 3 weeks into the year. My principal was very supportive and left it entirely up to me when I wanted to tell them. I think it is completely up to you when you want to share your news with parents and students.

I told mine through an email. I told them how excited we were to become parents like all of them, told them who would be filling in for me and all the wonderful expierence she has, etc.
I let my principal OK it first.

The response has been so supportive and positive. I work for an incredibly high matinance parent group. If there were any complaints made, no one told me about it. I think it would really put them off if they found out 2 months before my leave. The fact is they all did this 5 or so years ago too and they understand! Tell them!

micaelasmakeup

Can you split the difference with her and tell around Thanksgiving?
IMO if DDs K teacher were pg and I showed up one day and she was obviously pg, I would kinda be thinking well when were we going to find out about that?!

orchid8301

Maybe you should start wearing extremely tight shirts in the hopes that people start to notice.  

emm57

I teach preK in an elementary school and I already told my parents in an opening letter at the beginning of the school year. I felt it was important for the parents to know and not be blindsided later in the year. This way I can field most of their questions and concerns and let them know that I do have a plan for their children and I'm trying to make the transition as smooth as possible. 

I think you should go ahead with your plan, in my opinion, it's the most professional and respectful way to handle this with your parents. I think being honest, up front, and giving them plenty of time to talk to you and their children about the upcoming transition is in everyone's best interest and your principal sounds like she is being selfish. 

jrosa1

Thank you everyone! I am feeling g the exact same way as all of you about not keeping it a secret. I am excited to tell everyone and I'm definitely going to stick with my plan!

kbm2009

I am a teacher (3rd grade) and am planning on waiting as long as possible without tellling them. I feel like your principal.  No one wants their child in the substitute class.  If your school is anything like mine, parents will call wanting their child transfer, so the later the better,  It is worse the younger the students are.  

littlepig2

I'm also a teacher (middle school, though) and the kids have noticed and asked about my growing bump. I said something to one group of parents at Back to School Night but not the others. I think your principal is being really selfish in saying that she doesn't want you to tell because essentially it would be more work for her. I think your plan for the weekly newsletter sounds perfect!

iwubrory

It's interesting how different schools work. I didn't even consult my principal about when to tell my families. I told them at our open house three weeks into the school year. We're now at week 9. My friend who teaches kinder just told her parents two weeks ago and she hasn't had any crazy parent issues yet. My principal wouldn't tolerate requests for students to change classes in this situation anyway. I went out for the same amount of time two years ago and didn't have any problems from parents wanting to switch classes.

Mazingmommyof6

I have worked at schools for over 20 years. Principals are basically the CEO of that school. Principals and school board members are like a good ol boys club. Do what they ask and don't piss them off...they will back you up to the end if you are loyal to them and honor their wishes. Just my experience. Sending you hugs no matter what you do.

tiggernorton04

My supervisor told me that it wasn't necessary to tell parents yet but last week I decided to tell parents at Back to School night. As a STM, I think I am very obviously showing (was 19 weeks at Back to School Night). The first parent I saw actually asked me if I am expecting! So I am glad I told. Some of the parents were concerned but I think they have a right to know.

eacarmstrong

I am horrified by your principal's reaction. She has no right to tell you when to reveal your pregnancy. You should tell the parents and students whenever you want!