Childcare arrangement falling apart :(

jd614 · September 2013

DS is 7 mos old and for the last few mos we have been very fortunate to have my mother in law watch him 2 days a week and my mom 3 days a week. Last night I came home from work and my MIL drops a bomb on me that she received a call about a potential job oppty (shes a flight attendant) and training starts next week in NC. She is not sure what she is going to do yet. UMMM. Now despite the fact that we pay her, I do consider it a gift that she was watching DS. This was never a full time solution but we had an agreement this would go on until DS turned 1 in Feb when we would seek alternate care (a nanny or day care). My BIL and SIL are expecting in Feb as well and my MIL has always talked about helping them part time as well, so I was shocked to hear she was considering a position flying again. Whatever its done with--but of course im in a bind as this is taking place NEXT WEEK. So my question is...would you tell MIL that no matter what her decision is about this particular job, we think its time to find alternate care now instead of Feb and just start looking for nannies Or just wait until she makes a decision and if she still wants to watch DS instead of taking this job then leave it alone? I told her last night I need to know by tomorrow so that we can start figuring something out. Itll all work out, I am just stressed right now.

LoCarb · September 2013

I take a proactive approach with DC. Search for alternatives first, consider your options then communicate with your MIL. I would not wait until she makes a decision.

Virgo17 · September 2013

I'd start looking around for options and when you have something lined up ask MIL what her final decision is going to be. I do think it's crappy that she gave you such short notice, but sometimes that's how it goes with family. If you only need to cover two days a week, I bet you could find maybe a college student or mom in the neighborhood that could watch him for you.

*sparky* · September 2013

LoCarb said:

I take a proactive approach with DC. Search for alternatives first, consider your options then communicate with your MIL. I would not wait until she makes a decision.

This. Sorry you are in this bind - I would be a little panicked too.

cecilyandgautam · September 2013

Well I'd probably give MIL more than a day to decide whether to re-start her career, but that aside yes you need to start looking now. Luckily it's still summer and lots of families are on vacay - do you have a local moms listserve you can email? When one of the families in my in-home provider's care is on vacation, DCP treats it as a drop-in slot for families in a bind. If you emailed my local group explaining your need for urgent care 2 days a week as early as next week, I'd plug you in.